Say that even though you're white, you understand what other groups go through

From Create Your Own Story

"I may be white, but I feel your pain," you say. "I'm sorry for slavery and Jim Crow and Adolf. And I have a lot of minority friends."

There is dead silence in the room for several seconds. Then Annabelle lets out a loud snort. "Oh my God," she says. "Did you really just say that? So much fail in three short sentences. Let's see, where do I even begin? First of all, I'm not black or Jewish, so what's with the slavery and Jim Crow and Adolf talk? Second, the 'I feel your pain' line is a pathetic one that only sleazy politicians use. Third, you could have at least mentioned something about my background. Do you know anything about the history of the Philippines? You could have at least talked about the colonization of my ancestral homeland, first by Spain and then by the United States." As you open your mouth, she raises her hand. "But it would still be lame and pathetic for you to apologize for that. Why would I expect you to do that? You had nothing to do with the colonization, and all the people who did are long dead. And finally, that minority friends line? THE. OLDEST. WEAKEST. LINE. IN. THE. BOOK."

Annabelle continues her brutal "The Reason You Suck" speech. "I've had a lot of guys say incredibly stupid and awkward things when trying to date someone from a different background. White guys, black guys, Mexican guys...they've all said idiotic stuff. I try to broaden my horizons by sometimes dating guys other than Filipinos, but man, it's hard sometimes. But YOU. Oh. My. God. You just topped them all. That was the most epic fail of all epic fails. You know what? Not only are you fired, you're blacklisted. I'll make sure you never work in this industry again. Now get the fuck out."

You grab your stuff, race out the door, and jump into your shitty used car. As soon as you get home, you have yourself a good cry.

THE END