Joe

From Create Your Own Story

Joe is a resourceful fellow with friends in low, low places.

Full name: You don't need to know

Mother's maiden name: Lamont

Age: 25

Hair color: Blonde

Eye color: Blue

Address: 47 Quist Street, Hoboken, New Jersey

Occupation: Free Craigslist stuff harvester

Aliases: Outback Joe, Appalachia Joe

Height: 6 feet, 2 inches

Weight: 247 pounds

Disposition: Paranoid

Useful skills: Smashing things, application of duct tape, ranting about conspiracies, sit-ups, fine sense of smell, reading smudged text on 60-year-old vacuum tubes, caricaturing, boxing, silly accents, lack of table manners, night vision, leaving misleading footprints, ranting about communist conspiracies, booting fucked-up hard-drives, chuckling while his friend Steve looks at him with narrowed eyes and shakes his head, kicking ass, PLANNING FOR THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, et cetera.