Want to continue being a philosophy professor

From Create Your Own Story

Yeah, I bet you do.

The puke-smeared girl staggers out of your house and makes her way home somehow. You clean up, sleep it off, and head to school the next day, as if nothing ever happened. But what's this? Outside the philosophy building is a crowd of angry students from one of your school's many on-campus extracurricular organizations: Acting to Stop Sexual Harassment And Thingslikethat. The students have a horsewhip, eggs, and water balloons, and they are determined to reenact the egg scene from Elmer Gantry. You bolt for the door as they shower you with the missiles. You have to wipe away a double-yolked egg that hit you right in the face - and you see it was thrown by the Dean of Philosophy.

The disciplinary inquiry isn't over before your improbably-high bail is set for Attempted Rape by Incapacitation. You are hosed. You are wholly hosed. Your hosing hits and holds a historic high in the whole history of hosiery. Serves you right for not getting laid, the way I said.

The End.

Status
Health	{{{Health}}}	Identity: Jack Foster, Philosophy Professor
MP	{{{MP}}}
Level	{{{Level}}}