Slam the door and look for something to bar it with

From Create Your Own Story

You quickly bang the door shut and engage the rusted latch as the thugs advance. You look around frantically for something to bar the door with - you don't see anything in the hall that looks useful, and your heaviest possessions are firmly fixed to your chest. You're really starting to panic when suddenly you hear a very loud, wet fart behind you. It came from your tit-chomping neighbour, who's still passed out on the floor, snoring gently.

• Push your very fat neighbour against the door
• Look for something else
• Run like hell