Review: Inyashas Fantasy Land

From Create Your Own Story

Title: Inyashas Fantasy Land

Author: Syxxhidiki

Preview: You smirk at your reflection,dark raven unkept hair that seemed to be the envy of every males dreams,and emerald eyes that kept him mesmerizing to any women or even man that crosses his path, yes your definitely Xander Mcoy , occupation high school heart throb, yes you more than likely have a perfect life but sometimes perfect isn't enough, you need something new, something that will sweep you off your feet! suddenly you realize your gradfathers calling you...

Review: I felt that there was no better story to do my first review on than "Inyashas Fantasy Land". For those not familiar with IFL, it was previously featured as an example of what NOT to write. As far as fan stories on this site go, this is one of the absolute best. It's only got 24 pages, and lengths range from sentences to a little more than a paragraph, but what exists doesn't fail to entertain.

Half of the pages in the story include words like "hot", "sexy", and "babe" in the title, which is amusing in itself. The content of said pages, however, is pretty lacking. In fact, the only interesting thing that happens in the story is a tentacle dragging you into a well, which plays out differently depending on the gender you chose at the beginning - Guys beat the "ugly tentacle" with a history book, while a "long veiny tentacle" (...really?) releases the female player and goes off to do other, presumably more interesting tentacle activities.

Now, however, we come to my favorite part of the story - The grammar and spelling. Each page has at least one problem of some sort, whether it be run-on sentences, punctuation, spelling, or simple grammar. In fact, one page even uses both "your" and "ur", which is a new standard of bad.

Redlinks are also quite popular, as most of the 24 pages lead either absolutely nowhere or to a page where you choose to summon either a "sexy babe" or a "hot guy".

I'd recommend checking it out if you want a good laugh. It's like watching old '40s horror films and laughing at them.

Score: 1/10

(Hey, the "humor" gives it the one.)