User talk:Gayentertain
From Create Your Own Story
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{{warn1}}--[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 02:04, 18 November 2019 (UTC) | {{warn1}}--[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 02:04, 18 November 2019 (UTC) | ||
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| + | == Grammar and Punctuation == | ||
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| + | I was going through your recent contributions to ''Smutty Sex Romp'', which were actually quite impressive. There were just a few things I found myself needing to fix. | ||
| + | |||
| + | You accidentally switched from present to past tense on the page [[The stressed dad]]. I fixed it, but you can look back in the history to see where it happened. Everybody makes mistakes like this sometimes. I do it, you do it, and I bet even Platypus has done it before. It's just been kind of a headache to fix, since every branch from that page needs to be moved back to present tense. I'll come back to it tomorrow if you haven't fixed the tenses by then, but it would be mighty helpful if you wouldn't mind doing a few pages. Here are your recent contributions that need to be shifted back to present tense: | ||
| + | *[[Offer your hole to the manager]] | ||
| + | *[[Wait for David to return]] | ||
| + | |||
| + | Also, your dialogue punctuation was inconsistent. Sometimes you had it right, and sometimes you missed the mark. While I'm writing/editing, I like to have this page open in another tab: [[Punctuation with dialogue]]. It's a quick, handy guide Platypus made. | ||
| + | |||
| + | It doesn't have a specific example for some structures you like to use though, so I've pulled a couple from your contribution, [[The stressed dad]]: | ||
| + | |||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''You remove you hand but say "<font color=red>meet</font color> me in the bathroom for a bit of stress relief."''' | ||
| + | |||
| + | ^This one is not quite right. | ||
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| + | '''You remove you hand but say<font color=red>,</font color> "<font color=red>Meet</font color> me in the bathroom for a bit of stress relief."''' | ||
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| + | ^This is correct, at least as far as dialogue punctuation. The first letter of the quote is capitalized, as it is its own line of dialogue (and could be a sentence on its own), and the comma before the quote separates it from the rest of the sentence. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | This second one was actually pretty tricky. I had to google it myself because I wasn't sure how to punctuate it. | ||
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| + | '''The man <font color=red>looked</font color> down at you and <font color=red>said</font color> "Wait 10 minutes till you come out<font color=red>.</font color>" and <font color=red>turned</font color> to leave.''' | ||
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| + | ^Having a period at the end of the quote ends the sentence, making the 'and turned to leave' portion a fragment. Also, the tense has shifted to past when it should be present. | ||
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| + | '''The man <font color=red>looks</font color> down at you and <font color=red>says,</font color> "Wait 10 minutes before you come out<font color=red>,</font color>" and <font color=red>turns</font color> to leave.''' | ||
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| + | ^The tense has been shifted back, and a comma was added before the quote. And by ending the quote with a comma instead of a period, what was a fragment previously is now part of the sentence. | ||
| + | |||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | |||
| + | Dialogue punctuation is confusing, so I understand that you won't be suddenly perfect after I leave you this message. And I don't mind fixing punctuation so much-- it's just the tense shift that's really labor intensive. | ||
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| + | I'm really not trying to get on you here; I have literally no authority, and the most I'll do is leave you another message. I just thought that someone who contributes as often as you do might like a couple pointers. I hope this helped! | ||
| + | |||
| + | --[[User:Pickles|Pickles]] 05:56, 29 May 2020 (UTC) | ||
Revision as of 05:56, 29 May 2020
Please make sure to include the title of the story as a category on each page you post. If you don't know how to add categories, please review the Tutorial, especially Basic page format.--Platypus 02:04, 18 November 2019 (UTC)
Grammar and Punctuation
I was going through your recent contributions to Smutty Sex Romp, which were actually quite impressive. There were just a few things I found myself needing to fix.
You accidentally switched from present to past tense on the page The stressed dad. I fixed it, but you can look back in the history to see where it happened. Everybody makes mistakes like this sometimes. I do it, you do it, and I bet even Platypus has done it before. It's just been kind of a headache to fix, since every branch from that page needs to be moved back to present tense. I'll come back to it tomorrow if you haven't fixed the tenses by then, but it would be mighty helpful if you wouldn't mind doing a few pages. Here are your recent contributions that need to be shifted back to present tense:
Also, your dialogue punctuation was inconsistent. Sometimes you had it right, and sometimes you missed the mark. While I'm writing/editing, I like to have this page open in another tab: Punctuation with dialogue. It's a quick, handy guide Platypus made.
It doesn't have a specific example for some structures you like to use though, so I've pulled a couple from your contribution, The stressed dad:
You remove you hand but say "meet me in the bathroom for a bit of stress relief."
^This one is not quite right.
You remove you hand but say, "Meet me in the bathroom for a bit of stress relief."
^This is correct, at least as far as dialogue punctuation. The first letter of the quote is capitalized, as it is its own line of dialogue (and could be a sentence on its own), and the comma before the quote separates it from the rest of the sentence.
This second one was actually pretty tricky. I had to google it myself because I wasn't sure how to punctuate it.
The man looked down at you and said "Wait 10 minutes till you come out." and turned to leave.
^Having a period at the end of the quote ends the sentence, making the 'and turned to leave' portion a fragment. Also, the tense has shifted to past when it should be present.
The man looks down at you and says, "Wait 10 minutes before you come out," and turns to leave.
^The tense has been shifted back, and a comma was added before the quote. And by ending the quote with a comma instead of a period, what was a fragment previously is now part of the sentence.
Dialogue punctuation is confusing, so I understand that you won't be suddenly perfect after I leave you this message. And I don't mind fixing punctuation so much-- it's just the tense shift that's really labor intensive.
I'm really not trying to get on you here; I have literally no authority, and the most I'll do is leave you another message. I just thought that someone who contributes as often as you do might like a couple pointers. I hope this helped!
--Pickles 05:56, 29 May 2020 (UTC)
