Talk:SKULL
From Inselkampf
Skullduggerian Art and Culture, Highlights of Skullduggerian History
History Of SKULL
BlackGraceKidd
Formerly known as the Bunghole Pirates and now terrorizing the world as Skullduggery...
Poot_N_Tate
Out of the primordial muck on a world covered almost entirely in water, rose a creature known as a "bunghole" on a small island known for it's sturdy stone called "Bungholia".
Over time, these creatures became self-aware, and developed their island.
Over more time, they decided they like to say "Arrrr" a lot, and became pirates.
Over even more time, they realized they needed to band with other creatures that had evolved on other islands, they banded together and became the "Bunghole Pirates" or [SKULL]
And thus our story begins...
sumikoska
Initially, the Bungholians were self-sustaining island dwellers who had no contact with the outside world, but the large, skull-shaped stone totems seen on the shores of their island paradise inspired fear, superstition and wariness among passing sailors.
Thusly, long before the Bunghole Pirates ventured asea, greatly embellished tales of a fearsome and mysterious Skull clan, which rumor claimed, carved the massive skull statues from the heads of slain giants, crept as though a black and menacing wave across the seas of Inselkamp to the fair shores of a young arts colony on the tiny island of Skazinni, inspiring awe and mystery amongst the Skazzinnian people, who were proud to join such a fearsome alliance.
Here on Skazinni, there is a national holiday in celebration of the day when the Bunghole Pirates first arrived on the shores of Skazinni, bearing generous gifts of Bungholian stone, the finest in the land.
Due to language barriers, their frequent cry of "Arrrgghhh" was misinterpreted by the island's eldest virgin, Maramankinman, as a call for "arse"
Later two drunken sailors were seen emerging from her tents... and to this day, Skazinnian bards tell the merry farce "Raiders of the Lost Arse" in honor of the momentous occasion... although some noted scholars argue that the incident occurred during a later stone shipment from the Isle of Lesbos.
ChickCaesar
The history of the Isle of Lesbos is shrouded in myth. What little that has been unearthed is that one happy day on Paradise Island the Princess Diana, fed up with the lack of available, emotionally stable women, got into her invisible plane and took off without any clothes or luggage.
Spying a fair isle in Ocean 5, she landed to explore where she met a number of marooned pirates who eked out a living on red wine, thin-sliced bacon, and truffles. Diana took leadership of the band and also married all the women, using the men only for the occasional dalliance, softball batting practice, and to make little pirates. Arrgh.
d00rmaus
The Isle of Teapartyville was historically avoided by civilized beings. When the skull pirate Bitchslap found himself on it's shores he uttered the epic words 'yar, this ain't Lesbos for sure.' The natives, who had a history of partying hard and brutalizing orphans, threw a great party for their first visitor and allowed him to purchase the whole land for his shipment of rocks. Bitchslap later returned the island to its leader, stating 'We were just trying to get our parking validated so we could get the hell out of there.'
d00rmaus, the current dictator of the regime, still insists he's a part of the SKULL alliance. Recent technological developments in the field of 'wood floats on water' may result in this backward island spreading their brutal idiotic culture across the globe in the name of the unwary SKULL alliance.
PRESS RELEASES
TEAPARTYVILLE, Sea 7 (AP) -- d00rmaus, brutal dictator of the isle of Teapartyville, announced today the construction of a brothel dedicated to visiting sailors. The building, to be called 'Skullduggers Delight', is designed to increase tourism and trade to the musocratic nation.
Teapartyville has recently been under international scrutiny for it's orphan management policies. It's widely believed this has much to do with the countries stone shortfall. In his public address, d00rmaus stated 'Skullduggers Delight directly addresses both problems, now visitors to the isle have somewhere to get their rocks off.'
SKAZINNI, Sea 13 (AP) -- sumikoska, benevolent and well loved dowager Empress of arts colony at Skazinni ("May she live forever and her moronic philandering son never ascend to the throne") responded to recent reports of orphan stoning in Teaparty and the construction of an House of Ill-Repute with the following:
"Henceforth, we shall raise an embargo on the export of fine Skazinnian plum wine to the heathens of Teaparty in protest."
Later reports suggested that Empress sumikoska and her addled-brain son were seen skulking quietly out of one of the renowned "male only reviews" in the badlands on the outskirts of Lesbos.
ISLE OF LESBOS, Feb 20th (Chickiness Press International): Questions abound regarding about the sudden suspension of free, soya-enriched stone shipments from Lesbos. An investigative reporter was dispatched to audit the Lesbians and search every orifice for the misappropriated masonry. His conclusion before being stomped to death was that the rocks were NOT used for an all-male theatre on the amazon atoll, but rather a new softball stadium, shopping mall, and wine cellar.
Another investigation will begin just as soon as a volunteer can be found.
SKAZINNI, Sea 13 (AP) -- Shortly after dowager Empress SumikoSka's recent diplomatic visit to the Isle of Lesbos, Crown Prince Gaylord Primpernel (may his mother live forever) was arrested by the Lesbian Military for performing "unauthorized" orifice searches and spreading dissention amongst the Lesbian ranks with his wild tales of a "frisky" all male review on the Lesbian atoll.
In yet another victory for the wonders diplomacy, the misunderstanding was quickly resolved after three-hour closed door meeting between noble leader ChickCaesar, selected Skazinni scholars, and representatives from the Brothel and Bordello Merchants Association of Skazinni - who reportedly "thanked ChickCaesar profusely" for early stone investments into Skazinni's now thriving economy.
SKAZINNI, Sea 13 (AP) -- Two dozen Skazinnian reporters and politicians wandered in confused disarray around the Skullduggerian Proganda building at 13:43 NST after recieving a garbled message from a Lesbian page suggesting that "important matters of state" were afoot.
After installing an impromptu embassy in the former Portasan(tm) Chamber Pot Room Skazinnian scholars set themselves to mead-imbing and vigorous debate over the merit of the prosed Skullduggerian motto "Semper Arse"
SKAZINNI, Sea 13 (AP) -- 16:53 NST XIX: Hours into the "Semper Arse" debates the Lesbian page suddenly remerged with the disturbing news that there was a minor translation error and the proposed slogan was actually "Semper Yar".
Outraged representatives from the Skazinni Bordello and Brothel Merchants Association registered their offical note of protest.
TEAPARTYVILLE, Sea 7 (AP): Government sources revealed today that Teapartyville has entered a self-proclaimed 'Golden Age of Science and Technology'.
In a recent impromptu press conference held at the bordello, Minister d00rmaus stated 'The recent drought of plum wine has resulted in a nationwide state of sobriety. In this dreadful, painful haze we have come to realize that things do not simply appear as once believed.'
'There are in fact other islands in existence' he continued 'and the alliance we belong does in fact exist and is not the result of a bad trip as is commonly believed.'
'Rest assured that our top minds are working to find a solution to these problems. Until we have found a way to secure more plum wine, and have gained understanding of the vast and terrible world we live in, a moratorium on orphan stoning is in effect.'
The best and brightest are believed to consist of the 2 or 3 individuals on the island who are literate.
Dateline: Bungholia, Capital City.
There's a flurry of activity in Capital City as the island nation of Bungholia prepares for war. Unemployment is at an all-time low as every man,woman and child works overtime in the military industrial complex.
Emperor Poot_N_Tate, the Archiplegos Potinate, cheered workers on as the completed the new Catapult Factory on the Main Island of Bungholia.
"With this factory, we will now have a response to any bunghole nations that want to mess with us" Said Poot.
Meanwhile the Harbor in Capital City is full of ships and activity, as Poots "Hub and Spoke" Economic Theory bears fruit, with steamers from all colonies bringing constant materials to the feed the Bungholian War Machine.
CLIGNANCOURT, February 26 2007, PST
The streets of Clignancourt are impassable as the population tears up cobblestone for projectiles, and creates barricades with furniture in preparation for their greatly-anticipated enemy.
"Aux armes, citoyens!" cries Marie-Claude Jeannot, 38. "Formez vos bataillons!!!"
Down the street, Micheline Renard organizes her neighborhood and drills them until their makeshift spears flash as one. They are ready, she says, to defend the harbor against all incoming foes.
"Marchons, marchons!!!" she cries, as they march down the hill to the sea. Their eyes are fearsome, their jaws set, their backs rigid with determination.
On the radio, their fearless leader, Boadicea, rallies them with a blood-curdling cry:
"Q'UN SANG IMPUR ABREUVE NOS SILLONS!!!!!"
Let them come. No quarter asked, et point de quartier donne.
SKAZINNI (ASP 03:56 NST XIV): In response to recent rumors of a war brewing between Skull and Raid... followed by reports of rampant spying... the Skazinnian Society of Scribes and Bards jointly announced "Yea, tis the end of the world... thou partieth like its XIII"
Noted Bard Beoudogg was quoted as saying "Yo spy - stop drinkin' the the hater-aid, foo, before someone pops a catapult in yo ass."
