User talk:Fredhot16

From Create Your Own Story

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Mr fredhot16. I aint got time so pls send me your age. Im making a poll for ages PLs send me ur age ASAP.[[User:Michaeltamayo96|Michaeltamayo96]]
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[[User talk:Fredhot16/Archive 1]]
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I'm sorry. I'm a user as of yesterday and I was just trying to start a story of my own. Could the damage be reversed? --[ [User:Fredhot16]] 07:48, 3 May 2014
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==Changing other authors' writing==
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I have already undone it, but did you seriously think selecting every single bit of text on a page, then suddenly seeing nothing BUT your story was the proper way to go? I know people can get intimidated trying new things, but don't just forget all common sense at the same time...
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I noticed that you seem to do a lot of changing what other authors have written, instead of writing new material yourself. That's kind of disrespectful, in fact I would even call it vandalism, and you've done it to multiple authors. We shouldn't be erasing or changing what other authors write, if you want to contribute then write new chapters of your own, don't go changing the ones that other authors have spent a lot of time and effort writing. Thanks, buddy.
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No, I didn't think about that. I'm very sorry for the trouble. --[ [User:Fredhot16:Fredhot16]] 09:38, 3 May 2014
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==Archives==
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What exactly is [[My Little Pony: Choose Your Own Adventure]] supposed to be?  If it's supposed to be a story, it needs choices and it needs a category.  Please don't post incomplete pages.  Incomplete pages will be edited or deleted. --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 04:09, 25 January 2015 (UTC)
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I put all your old messages in an archive file to help clean things up. Hope it helps!
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 21:33, 28 February 2019 (UTC)
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Dungeon and dragons
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Why are those choices in Darkness?  Because the story is open for anyone to edit and some people are desperate to read stories about copping a feel, no matter how story-inappropriate that choice is, and some people freak when they realize they've been reading a story from a female perspective and have to force the story into a male perspective, no matter how inappropriate it is given the story thus far. --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 03:05, 9 March 2016 (UTC)
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Hello Fredhot16.
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I noticed that you was one of last writers in "Dungeon and dragons" and I wonder if I can copy it and publish on chyoa.com? I would add in the description it isn't writed by me, to not plagiation your work. I don't know if you are the right person to ask, but this site looks unclean for me.
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One thing you may want to consider is that choices don’t necessarily have to seem logical.  Consider that following scenario: Your son hasn’t come home from school and you’re worried about him.  Do you: A) call the police? B) hire a private detective? C) search the neighborhood? D) get a rowboat and sail out to sea?  A, B, & C are obvious choices, but the ridiculously illogical choice D… is what Gepetto chose in the Adventures of Pinocchio.  And somehow that worked out. --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 15:30, 10 March 2016 (UTC)
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== Help with Mega-story, looking for partnerships/contributions ==
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You're typing more than you need to...
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Hey Fredhot16,
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<nowiki>[[ Ventrue|Ventrue]]</nowiki> tells the wiki "Instead of displaying the link to the page titled 'Ventrue' as 'Ventrue', instead display it as 'Ventrue'."  Kind of redundant, no?  The | is useful when you want the link to display as something ''different''.  For example <nowiki>[[Ventrue|Aristocrats]]</nowiki> would send people to a page titled 'Ventrue', but the link would display as 'Aristocrats'.  
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I was wondering if you would be up for helping me out with the [[Tales of Illnora]] mega-story that I started up.
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--[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 15:12, 11 March 2016 (UTC)
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You could just place a note on the page such as "clan descriptions are copyright White Wolf Game Studio". --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 16:04, 11 March 2016 (UTC)
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FYI: Its intended to be an Adult story with multiple branching off points with the common theme of all focusing on story and character development. At this point however, my ideas and goals for it are somewhat hazy. Having one or more people who are actively contributing to the overarching narrative and premise would be very helpful. --Durzan 21:28, 28 February 2019 (UTC)
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Aren't you going to revise the story anymore?
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Well, this stuff is a bit hard for me to explain, so I'll just describe it as best as I can:
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[[User : Darky]]
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'''Overview:'''
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If you want to contribute to Darkness by adding more pages, fine.  If you want to rip out pages because you don't like certain choices, NOT FINE.  Leave those pages alone.  I wrote them and they are staying.  PERIOD. --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 18:42, 5 April 2016 (UTC)
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'''Genre:''' Fantasy
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I know you know how to categorize your pages. Categorize them!--[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 13:35, 8 April 2016 (UTC)
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'''Base Concept:''' Tales of Illnora isn't so much a single story, as it is a collection of stories that take place over a number of different time periods on a single world (hence why I called it Tales of Illnora, and why I called it a mega-story). Basically, the idea is that each story (or group of stories), is its own general narrative and that they are linked by the setting and the specific time period. Each story will have some RPG elements (Classes, choice of race, etc), and will have some degree of sandboxing to it. If the stories are in the same time period, then they could interact and overlap with one another (difficult to setup but possible).
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Categorizing is not something to be saved for 'later'.  Either the page is categorized when it's posted or the page gets deleted.  It's that simple.
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There are four time periods that I currently got planned (Only got 1 time-period link established, willing to cut them down or alter them) from which stories can branch out from:
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If you've read a significant amount of Darkness, and it seems that you have, then you should have some understanding of what kind of story it is. If you don't understand it, I don't think that I can explain it any further. --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 18:27, 8 April 2016 (UTC)
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The First Empire Era (era where Dragons ruled the world and are the only playable race).
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A discussion page exists for discussing the associated story page, so if you want to discuss the tropes that you feel are associated with that story page, it's appropriate to do so. Been spending a bit of time over at tvtropes? --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 14:13, 15 April 2016 (UTC)
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The Great Cataclysm (Short period where the world is breaking due to Dragons messing with forces they can't understand).  
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== Your message ==
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the Golden Era (Humans rule the world, and dragons are shadows of their former selves).
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I did not make the page 'Punish her' for the red head in slaves life. If you have a problem, message the people who edited it last.
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the Silver Age (Dragons nearly extinct, but their bloodlines are strong enough that Dragonborn occasionally pop up throughout the lineage of the different humanoid races that are descended from Golden Age).
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From PanzerLord1943
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Of the four ages, I currently only have one age officially established (IE with blue links) and I have only started working on one story for it, with that story being [[ToI -- The Dragon Master]].
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'''Concept of the Dragon Master story:''' In the Dragon Master storyline, Dragons who visit the human realm are hunted down, captured, and enslaved by both licensed humans (''Dragon Catchers''), by government enforcers (Dragon Masters), and by poachers. At the beginning you are given a choice of gender and race, which... depending on your choice will split you onto one of two main story branches.
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== [[User talk:DirtyMeStoryTime|DirtyMeStoryTime]]'s talk ==
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If you are human, you are given the choice between being hired to work as a ''Dragon Poacher'' (i.e. you become a criminal), or being hired as an aide to a professional ''Dragon Master'' (think of them as being like special agents of the FBI who are tasked with handling all issues dealing with a specific kind of situation; in this case its anything to do with Dragons and Exotic creatures) with the goal of becoming one yourself.
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Do not delete an entire index and replace it with just your story again... --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 09:27, 2 May 2014 (UTC)
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And, you should normally respond on the person's user page, not on your user page, or else they probably won't see it. But make sure is it User talk:, not User:. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 05:38, 3 May 2014 (UTC)
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If you become a poacher, you try to capture and sell as many dragons as you can while evading the law for as long as possible.  
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Just to let you know, I alphabetized your stories in the mature section, so if you don't spot them, please note they are in a different location, not removed. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 18:37, 16 May 2014 (UTC)
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If you choose the path of becoming a Dragon Master however, you are given various tasks that involve dragons in one form or another, and are tasked with gaining ownership/protective custody of as many dragons as you can in your free time, and then training and/or developing a relationship with them.  
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{{warn1}} --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 12:03, 17 May 2014 (UTC)
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Regardless of which path the player chooses, they may choose to treat their dragon slaves with kindness or with cruelty, but doing so will have consequences. Ultimately the main purpose of this branch is to focus on the relationships between you and your dragons, and explore how it affects you. Possible endings would include: setting your dragons free, keeping them, dying in various mishaps or getting eaten by one, getting arrested, and so forth.
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So, it has been a while since we last talked. I just wanted to stop in and say hi, and let you know I am looking for people to help me expand my story, [[The Exhibitionist]]. Just drop a couple options you would like me to write or something. A couple others have already been sweet and given me some options, but the more, the merrier! But, you don't need to, it is entirely optional (gogogogogogogogogo addadddadddaddadd) '''Thinks to herself, "are my subliminals working?''' Wait, did I say that outloud? So sorry :o Please forgive me. <nowiki>*</nowiki>beg beg beg beg<nowiki>*</nowiki>. Anyways, hope to see you there ^.^ --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 10:38, 18 March 2016 (UTC)
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If you are a Dragon, then the storyline is a bit more linear in nature. You go into the human lands hoping to start a new and better life (The Dragon lands are in a state of perpetual famine), get captured by a Dragon Master (and possibly sold to another person), and are tasked with figuring out how to either escape and live in hiding in the Human Lands, befriending the Dragon Master and becoming his familar, or convincing him to let you go.
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lol, but it is an adult story. Yes, I know what you mean, I don't bother reading most of the stories. I do write stories other than adults, but I am not that good, to be honest. I draw on my experience to write my stories, and many of my past history consisted of 3 things: Drugs, sex, and physical/emotional pain. I have tried writing about my pain, but honestly, when I read it, it makes me feel like I come across as whiny. I have written sometimes about drugs, but honestly, it is hard to describe what it feels like to be high. So, that leaves me with sex...I would love to write fantasy, sci fi, mystery, crime, etc, but every time I try, at least when I read, it always sounds so cliche. I think maybe the only difference is, I write my erotica based on my real life, so I try to make it realistic. Sometimes I get carried away, but normally I try to make it believable. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 13:33, 18 March 2016 (UTC)
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'''Tone & Mood:''' Varies according to the time period and specific story, but in general, all stories should have parts that are serious and parts that are funny. Some should be more serious and more drama laden than others, but there is a time and a place for each in every story. In the Dragon Master, the tone is supposed to be at parts sober, and at other parts funny... and at other parts disgusting or horrifying (we are dealing with slavery after all).
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Adding a little more: Yes, I have also written a couple of non-adult stories. You can check my user page for the stories I have written, but you can probably guess after looking at them that I do not do as good... --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 13:35, 18 March 2016 (UTC)
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'''Theme:''' Again, varies depending on the time period and the specific story being told. In the Dragon Master, the themes are about the relationships between humans and dragons.
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Yes, yes, I talk too much. Even in real life. I have started a story, [[Context]], but unlike [[The Exhibitionist]], it is not a community driven story. For [[The Exhibitionist]]. I will only work on options given to me, and those ideas that spring from them during story mode. I do not create new paths. However, for [[Context]], I am trying something completely different, keyworks located in the story itself. I am still trying to figure out how to work it though. Mostly, I am aiming it at non-adult, but have categorized it as adult because I imagine at some point I will have some level of adult content, but thinking of making it more of a silly, strange, random, train of thought type of story. Anyways, I will STFU now...I know I talk too much, and type too much... I like interaction, not isolation... --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 13:45, 18 March 2016 (UTC)
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Well, thats basically the gist of what I can tell you at the moment.  
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Hello, so, you want stories that are adult but not really sex stories like 99%? Want to try my [[Short Bursts]] story? Let me know what you think? Yes, I will have graphic sex in there, and graphic other things. lol, you will probably be able to tell once you read the first two I have completed. Anyways, just want to know what you think, since it seems like you are not one who is here only for the graphic sex stories, but for actual stories. Anyways, I would like it if you let me know what you think about them. Yes, I am a needy, insecure person, so like to hear if my stuff is good. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 08:37, 21 March 2016 (UTC)
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I am hoping to work on the Dragon Master and get the basis for that storyline fleshed out before we start on other time periods and/or stories. Also, keep in mind that this is to be a public story, so each story and option should have a somewhat sandbox nature to it.
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Hmm, where to start. I notice some of the things you have posted on Darky's talk page. Not saying I don't understand, or sympathize, but, are you sure this is really the correct way to go about it? I guess, he started the story, and while it seems that he should be able to do more than make it one of another, lots, of adult stories, are you sure criticizing him is really the way to go? It seems your view and his view are clashing, and I am not sure it is really that helpful at this point. Possibly you could make your own story that follows a vision you have? Not trying to get in the middle of it, but it just seems like many posts on his page are "Man, why would you even go there". I have the feeling he has changed the path, like the feather tickling, mostly because of your feedback, but... I guess, like me, I try to make non-adult stories. I try to make something that is not in the realm of "naughty", but I find most of the time when I try, I run out of story too quickly. I guess I am just better at erotica than I am at conventional stories. So, I sympathize with Darky too. But honestly, when the thing I see on the first page is "stunning girl with a nice butt and b-cup breasts", well, I think that was always his direction. I mean, what does her butt and breasts have to do with being a barbarian? She has a butt, she has breasts, but when there is a need to highlight them, I guess there was already a set direction in the author's eyes. Is it really that constructive to keep bugging him about "Man, why go there"? The only way it could have screamed more adult is if there was also the guy's penis size. I guess I am saying it seems like you would have a better story by writing your own. Maybe "Sherry becomes a barbarian girl", and run with it. Sorry, I know you are free to keep messaging him, but it just seems like it is only nagging about another author not meeting your expectations at this point. Just my opinion though. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 01:34, 29 March 2016 (UTC)
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If you need any more information about the world or the lore of Illnora, don't hesitate to ask. I already put some basic information in the story, but not all of it is fleshed out yet... at least on CYOS anyway.
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Sigh, and yet another story with "DD cup breasts, and a round and firm ass"... I swear, as I said above, I sympathize with you...every time I see something like this it makes me want to scream... Why do all women need to be unrealistically proportioned in like 90% of all the stories here, and why do they all need to have DD breasts unless someone is trying to create some under age style story? Seriously...it is frustrating... --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 02:51, 29 March 2016 (UTC)
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 06:01, 2 March 2019 (UTC)
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lol, so cabin in the woods xD
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<nowiki>----</nowiki>
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Loved that movie --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 14:31, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
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Sure, no problem. Were you thinking of one for the main page, or one for each story?
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 17:03, 3 March 2019 (UTC)
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No worries, I have not ignored your messages. Just, I suffer writers block frequently. Guess I get busy with other things and cannot really focus on writing. So, not ignoring, just not contributing anything right now because I am not sure what to contribute. That has always been one of my problems with writing, I start off okay, then end up losing my path completely for a while. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 01:26, 7 April 2016 (UTC)
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Okay, just made the two pages. --[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 18:58, 3 March 2019 (UTC)
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Honestly, blank or pre made are fine, depending on how it is done. I normally try to fill in details like with dreams, memories, etc. [[Dirty Me]] originally started mostly from my blog material, with some side options to make it a CYoS. Sometimes, I did better, when I used my own experience to write, other times, I did worse, especially when I was just trying to make an option to have an option, and when I was not really in a writing mood. "Okay, lets just put in some sex stuff for the readers to make them happy, and go work on something else". Those are probably the worst paths. [[Too Graphic]] is a WIP, majorly. I need to actually put story in. Doing it more because on my blog people told me they liked pictures. So, figured, let me figure out my path, and put some pictures in, then tell a story based on those. But, it is very sexual. Again, the issue I have with being able to write based on my own experiences, without sounding like a whiny bitch. If you want to get what I mean by that, try reading this path on [[Dirty Me]]: [[Dirty Me/Go ahead and accept the party invitation]] -> [[Dirty Me/Sure, one beer can't hurt]] -> [[Dirty Me/Go home and try to forget this]] -> [[Dirty Me/Pretend like you have no idea what happened and that you would love to party with him]]. I wanted to put how I felt, but, not sure how most of the readers here will react. I assume though I am right: whiny bitch. Especially when you think about what you said some people post on here. Raping a girl and she magically likes it after. Like, I started reading this, [[The Sexual Adventures of You]], the female path, and it was okay, until the rapist. I mean, I shook my head at the "good girl randomly has sex with the army dude", or has sex with her brother, or neighbor, or whatever. But, I read, until the rapist, and turning him into a sex slave. Yeah, just sort of threw up my hands and said okay, that is too much...get a female writer, or at least try, '''try''', to imagine what a "good girl" would do. I mean, if you want to put that stuff, then make her the bad girl...
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Thanks for the resources, Fredhot!
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 03:36, 9 March 2019 (UTC)
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One thing I actually love about reading [[User:Teejay]]'s stuff. He makes the characters human. Not that I read all his stuff, he tried to follow the story line, but some that have good options he can write about. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 14:47, 8 April 2016 (UTC)
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Well, which branch do you think we should focus on?
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 03:33, 2 May 2019 (UTC)
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Hmm, think you might be confused. I said on the good girl path, when the guy tries to rape the character, and he ends up in on the other end of his knife, the only option seems to be to turn him into a sex slave. I sort of liked the cut off his clothes and leave him there, but the author doesn't seem to be willing to let that happen, and keeps pushing towards keeping him as a sex slave. As for rape, did you read my path that I posted last time? That is exactly what it covers. I have been raped twice in real life, so I write from experience.
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Started a discussion on the dragon masters in [[Talk:Begin your training (TDM/MHW)]].
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 13:49, 6 May 2019 (UTC)
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As for what Teejay writes, he tends to add on existing, not have a stand alone story. [[Special:Contributions/Teejay]]
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== Slaves Life ==
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One warning though, Platypus has warned you about categories, and I notice he is now deleting your pages. If you do not add them, he will ban you from this website. Don't be stubborn, just put category, even if you are still working on it...
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Hey Fredhot16, I noticed that you worked on [[Slaves Life]] a couple of times previously. Recently I adopted that story and started a reimagined version of it on CHYOA (renamed to Life of a Slave), which currently gets a lot more viewers than this site and has a few additional flexibilities when it comes to interactive fiction. Especially since this site tends to be a bit unstable.  
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Anyways, on a lighter note, here you go. Made this template just for you, so you can post and not need to worry about the 20 minute link thing:
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Anyway, I was wondering if you'd like to collab with me on CHYOA and help out with the story, particularly on adapting Willow's route. If you're interested, hit me up.
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{{Hypnobutt}}
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 15:18, 19 April 2020 (UTC)
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lol, guess you liked my templates=P
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Sure, no problem. Here's the link (chyoa.com/story/Life-of-a-Slave.27660). Your gonna have to create an account and send me a message on there (same username over there for me), otherwise I can't add your username to the editor list.
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btw, I changed your user page to the Index Link instead of Too Graphic Link. Mostly because I set up Index link for use on the main page, so it will not change much, but I cannot say the same thing for my too graphic link. After all, if I change it to pink, or red, are you sure you would want that? I just want to find a good color combination for it, and possibly see if I can use a background image in the future. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 01:43, 11 April 2016 (UTC)
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I can easily relate to the bad work ethic, lol.
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Going to add to them, but last week my brain just didn't want to think...I actually thought of something funny to do with [[Context]], with a misnamed news story. Now to put it into reality. Yeah, my projects tend to be hit or miss xD --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 01:30, 25 April 2016 (UTC)
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P.S. Its called that because I think it sounds a tad better than "Slaves Life" IMHO. If you want an in story reason, well... guess we'll just have to write and find out :D. My initial thought is that the main character is intimately involved with the life of his newly purchased slave, and thus he's witnessing first hand what its like to be a slave, even as he trains, sleeps with, and controls her. I kinda see this story as a bit of a romance. Gives the story added depth behind it, which is always a plus for any kind of story, erotic or otherwise.
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 00:40, 25 April 2020 (UTC)
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No worries, saw the first message, and the second=P I think part of my problem is, at the beginning you kept telling everyone "Hey, I put up a page, please go to this link, check these out, then write stuff for it". It seemed more like you wanted others to write a story with your idea in mind. I noted Teejay had pointed out he would be willing to add, but wanted you to first so he could build on that. It is somewhat the same with me. I am more of the responder type than the initiator type normally. So, I guess it is good that you added some of the thoughts about what each character should be like. But, that is my other problem. I don't really feel anything when I read it. It doesn't spark anything that I really want to add. lol, Platypus just mentioned the same thing to me on my page xD When an idea strikes, sure, no problem adding, but hard to generate an idea from nothing. And sadly, you can sort of see what my writing moods have been lately, since I have been working more on [[DirtyMeStoryTime Rants]], making fun of some of the stereotyped stories on here. Can you find the originals? The innocent path idea, [[DirtyMeStoryTime Rants/Horny for innocent girls]], was the recent family story someone worked on, like [[AAF - The talk]], [["Ok, Scott. I trust you."]], and [[AAF - It works.]]. All of these I removed the underage stuff. I mean, the writer had his 4th grade sister having sex with him...Notice how my innocent girl is 18, yet looks 10? Yeah, because I am making fun of that stuff. For a short time I started asking people on their talk page why everyone seemed to write that the girl was "DD", which is why I created [[DirtyMeStoryTime Rants/Horny for DD]]. I am even making fun of [[Smutty Sex Romp]] with [[DirtyMeStoryTime Rants/Horny for sluts]]. Once I finish the loop, the reader can just have the girl having sex forever, although they will only really have 8 options. I even added a new option to make fun of the [[Pokesex/Pokemon]], but I still need to put the story in. Not sure how I will write that. Even [[Context]], once I work on it, will have some options that will point out how absurd some writers paint women as on here. I am not really pointing at you, or at anyone specific. It is just me making fun of some common things I see on here. Like, sex with absolutely no story, although I must admit that I wrote a few things in [[Dirty Me]] simply to try to "fit in" and keep people wanting to read. One reason I sort of lost interest in working on it, when I found myself writing, not about my experiences, fantasies, or what I want to write about, but instead writing things just so more people would read, and falling into the same rut that many writers do on here. Anyways, think I have went on too long, and probably sound like a whiny bitch now...so I will stop typing. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 01:41, 28 April 2016 (UTC)
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Okay, got you added in as an editor. Plus, I sent you a direct message on CHYOA.
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--[[User:Durzan|Durzan]] 21:36, 25 April 2020 (UTC)
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Sorry if I intimidated you in my last message :o
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==Main Page==
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I had to put protections against editing on the Main Page due to a persistent vandal.  I may take the protections off again, as things seem to have calmed down. --[[User:Platypus|Platypus]] 14:40, 16 October 2021 (UTC)
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Oh, and I added a bit of an "about me", well, about my real life experiences... if you are interested. [[User:DirtyMeStoryTime/IRL sex experiences]] --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 02:37, 4 May 2016 (UTC)
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== DirtyMeStoryTime ==
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btw, for your:
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lol, yeah, been a while. I don't actually come here. Just, some of the stories around make me feel physically ill. I know, it isn't you, or Platy, or Tee. I ended up moving my writings to discord.
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10. Are sex scenes or explicit sexual descriptions really necessary in a Adult CYOS? (O.K, not a important question for the story but it still stands.)
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Yes, my bathroom door was fixed. That was the second time. Fortunately, it hasn't broken again. Glass bathroom door, so it shattered into lots of pieces those two times.
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Honestly, I think they can be very good, and push the plot, letting you imagine yourself in the scene, if done right. However, I think many people tend to just throw out "Position, penetration, release, random gibberish".
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As for CYOA style, I think that may be a bit why I disappeared. I think I just write better linearly. As for the choice aspect, I guess it depends on the viewpoint. If you are writing a character viewpoint, then yes, it should be more about their reactions to the events that happen around them. However, there is the other, where the viewer is more of a "god" type of thing, like a civilization game or whatever. Rather than figuring out how the character reacts to stimulus, you instead figure out what happens to the character. I guess it depends on what kind of story you are writing. However, yeah, I think a majority focuses on what the character does and how they react, rather than what happens to the character, which I would completely agree with your viewpoint. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 03:42, 7 December 2021 (UTC)
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Here, from my [[Dirty Me/Get the gun, just to scare him away]], the rape scene, based on the first time I was raped irl.
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Sure. I don't stop in often, but do time to time. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 07:35, 24 January 2022 (UTC)
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<blockquote>You hear him yelling at you, but cannot grasp the meaning of the words. He jumps on you, yelling at you more, then you start feeling his hands. You feel him pulling your blouse, popping off buttons, ripping it off. His hand pulls at your pants, undoing them.<br>
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You lift your hands, trying to push him, to stop him, to fight him.<br>
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His fist connects with your stomach, knocking the air out of you, leaving you trying to catch your breath. When you finally do, it hurts, trying to suck in breath.<br>
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Your pants are around your knees.<br>
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You try to stop him again, and he punches you again, harder. You feel like throwing up, like your insides are hurt.<br>
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He takes your pants the rest of the way off, now that you are no longer trying to stop him, then rips your panties off.<br>
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You suddenly understand what he is about to do as he starts undoing his pants.<br>
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You yell at him, scream at him, but it doesn't matter. He forces your legs apart and punches you once more as you try to keep your legs closed, try to stop what he is doing.<br>
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He pushes in, and you scream, feeling him tearing your vagina, entering you dry. He ignores you, like a wild animal, and continues pushing himself in you, forcing himself deeper into you. You hurt so bad you cannot stop yourself from crying, sobbing, screaming. He pounds you for a short time before cumming inside you.<br>
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Laying on top of you, he rests for a few second before pushing himself up, getting off you.<br>
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He slaps your face a couple times, laughing, as pain blossoms on your cheeks.<br>
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Finally, he stands up, doing up his pants, and looking down at you in disgust, and maybe even a little guilt. You don't know because it is hard to see, as you sob in pain.<br>
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He leaves, with you curled up on the floor, crying.</blockquote>
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Now, think about the way most people on here write about raping a girl. At first she is is all "eek, no Mr. don't do this to me" and then she is like "Oh god, I like your cock so much, I am glad you raped me". Seriously, read how many authors read about it. Now, read what I wrote again. Can you imagine the broken girl, battered and raped, the pain she is feeling, how it feels to be her?
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Yeah, this is one of those cases where I honestly think, heavier description makes it more real. Of course, I guess the next question is: Do most people who write on this site really want to read about that, to think that the woman would feel like this?
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Now, this one is a little long, so I will just leave you the link: dirtylittlemestories.blogspot.com/2013/09/slow-motion-love-final-polished-story.html
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Read that one. Can you feel the love with it? That was what I wrote about me and my husband being intimate. Doesn't it paint a better picture of our love making, and the feelings inside of me, than just "We made love, he was tender, it was good"?
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See, this is the problem. You read so many of these CYoS's that are just mindless "I want to imagine having sex with a woman like this" that I don't think you see the emotion. I think descriptions, while not always needed, nor always wanted, can pain the story.
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Or, take for example, me loosing my virginity here: [[Dirty Me/Dream of your first time]], doesn't that show the awkwardness of "the first time"? Yeah, I know, I fall into the same problems that others do on here, especially when I am just writing to make more story for people to read and not feeling it, but...
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See, when I write a sex scene, I close my eyes. I picture it in my head. I go through the motions. I use toys if needed, fingers, hands. Then, I write, then close my eyes, imagine more, write more. At least when I am doing it right.
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So, I do not completely agree that it does not help the story, if handled correctly. --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 10:37, 4 May 2016 (UTC)
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Lol you are telling a girl about the annoying ways people on here write about breasts? If you read my stories I normally do not describe a female's size. In part so the reader can imagine it. In another part because I honestly do not want some comparison to myself. I am a c cup. How do you think I feel reading all of these "she has a pair of DDs". You know how hard it has been for me to find every instance of that and either put my own size in to replace, or just remove?
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As for the cup/bust size, at least they are trying to figure out how a woman works. I have mentioned that to people here before. But yeah... notice my dd rant story? That was to keep from going bitch mode on people...
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And I understand too many ideas. Just look at how complete mine are...
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Sadly, right now I just have a phone with bad internet to type on... --[[User:DirtyMeStoryTime|Dirty Me]] 04:21, 10 June 2016 (UTC)
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== [[User talk:Teejay|Teejay]]'s talk ==
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If you could do a page or two on your new stories, just so I can get a feel for them, I'd be happy to contribute. -- [[User:Teejay|Teejay]]
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I will look at Anime School then. Thanks for suggesting it. -- [[User:Teejay|Teejay]]
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Anime School says "Do Not Edit." -- [[User:Teejay|Teejay]]
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Formality is definitely not necessary. I'm the casual type. :) I suppose if it's been a while, even though it says Do Not Edit... -- [[User:Teejay|Teejay]]
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I love collaborations! I did a nice one with [[User:AgentVincent|AgentVincent]] on a section of Rampage a couple years back. -- [[User:Teejay|Teejay]]
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Current revision as of 08:14, 14 November 2022

User talk:Fredhot16/Archive 1

Contents

Changing other authors' writing

I noticed that you seem to do a lot of changing what other authors have written, instead of writing new material yourself. That's kind of disrespectful, in fact I would even call it vandalism, and you've done it to multiple authors. We shouldn't be erasing or changing what other authors write, if you want to contribute then write new chapters of your own, don't go changing the ones that other authors have spent a lot of time and effort writing. Thanks, buddy.

Archives

I put all your old messages in an archive file to help clean things up. Hope it helps! --Durzan 21:33, 28 February 2019 (UTC) Dungeon and dragons

Hello Fredhot16. I noticed that you was one of last writers in "Dungeon and dragons" and I wonder if I can copy it and publish on chyoa.com? I would add in the description it isn't writed by me, to not plagiation your work. I don't know if you are the right person to ask, but this site looks unclean for me.

Help with Mega-story, looking for partnerships/contributions

Hey Fredhot16,

I was wondering if you would be up for helping me out with the Tales of Illnora mega-story that I started up.

FYI: Its intended to be an Adult story with multiple branching off points with the common theme of all focusing on story and character development. At this point however, my ideas and goals for it are somewhat hazy. Having one or more people who are actively contributing to the overarching narrative and premise would be very helpful. --Durzan 21:28, 28 February 2019 (UTC)

Well, this stuff is a bit hard for me to explain, so I'll just describe it as best as I can:

Overview:

Genre: Fantasy

Base Concept: Tales of Illnora isn't so much a single story, as it is a collection of stories that take place over a number of different time periods on a single world (hence why I called it Tales of Illnora, and why I called it a mega-story). Basically, the idea is that each story (or group of stories), is its own general narrative and that they are linked by the setting and the specific time period. Each story will have some RPG elements (Classes, choice of race, etc), and will have some degree of sandboxing to it. If the stories are in the same time period, then they could interact and overlap with one another (difficult to setup but possible).

There are four time periods that I currently got planned (Only got 1 time-period link established, willing to cut them down or alter them) from which stories can branch out from:

The First Empire Era (era where Dragons ruled the world and are the only playable race).

The Great Cataclysm (Short period where the world is breaking due to Dragons messing with forces they can't understand).

the Golden Era (Humans rule the world, and dragons are shadows of their former selves).

the Silver Age (Dragons nearly extinct, but their bloodlines are strong enough that Dragonborn occasionally pop up throughout the lineage of the different humanoid races that are descended from Golden Age).

Of the four ages, I currently only have one age officially established (IE with blue links) and I have only started working on one story for it, with that story being ToI -- The Dragon Master.

Concept of the Dragon Master story: In the Dragon Master storyline, Dragons who visit the human realm are hunted down, captured, and enslaved by both licensed humans (Dragon Catchers), by government enforcers (Dragon Masters), and by poachers. At the beginning you are given a choice of gender and race, which... depending on your choice will split you onto one of two main story branches.

If you are human, you are given the choice between being hired to work as a Dragon Poacher (i.e. you become a criminal), or being hired as an aide to a professional Dragon Master (think of them as being like special agents of the FBI who are tasked with handling all issues dealing with a specific kind of situation; in this case its anything to do with Dragons and Exotic creatures) with the goal of becoming one yourself.

If you become a poacher, you try to capture and sell as many dragons as you can while evading the law for as long as possible.

If you choose the path of becoming a Dragon Master however, you are given various tasks that involve dragons in one form or another, and are tasked with gaining ownership/protective custody of as many dragons as you can in your free time, and then training and/or developing a relationship with them.

Regardless of which path the player chooses, they may choose to treat their dragon slaves with kindness or with cruelty, but doing so will have consequences. Ultimately the main purpose of this branch is to focus on the relationships between you and your dragons, and explore how it affects you. Possible endings would include: setting your dragons free, keeping them, dying in various mishaps or getting eaten by one, getting arrested, and so forth.

If you are a Dragon, then the storyline is a bit more linear in nature. You go into the human lands hoping to start a new and better life (The Dragon lands are in a state of perpetual famine), get captured by a Dragon Master (and possibly sold to another person), and are tasked with figuring out how to either escape and live in hiding in the Human Lands, befriending the Dragon Master and becoming his familar, or convincing him to let you go.

Tone & Mood: Varies according to the time period and specific story, but in general, all stories should have parts that are serious and parts that are funny. Some should be more serious and more drama laden than others, but there is a time and a place for each in every story. In the Dragon Master, the tone is supposed to be at parts sober, and at other parts funny... and at other parts disgusting or horrifying (we are dealing with slavery after all).

Theme: Again, varies depending on the time period and the specific story being told. In the Dragon Master, the themes are about the relationships between humans and dragons.

Well, thats basically the gist of what I can tell you at the moment.

I am hoping to work on the Dragon Master and get the basis for that storyline fleshed out before we start on other time periods and/or stories. Also, keep in mind that this is to be a public story, so each story and option should have a somewhat sandbox nature to it.

If you need any more information about the world or the lore of Illnora, don't hesitate to ask. I already put some basic information in the story, but not all of it is fleshed out yet... at least on CYOS anyway.

--Durzan 06:01, 2 March 2019 (UTC)

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Sure, no problem. Were you thinking of one for the main page, or one for each story? --Durzan 17:03, 3 March 2019 (UTC)

Okay, just made the two pages. --Durzan 18:58, 3 March 2019 (UTC)

Thanks for the resources, Fredhot! --Durzan 03:36, 9 March 2019 (UTC)

Well, which branch do you think we should focus on? --Durzan 03:33, 2 May 2019 (UTC)

Started a discussion on the dragon masters in Talk:Begin your training (TDM/MHW). --Durzan 13:49, 6 May 2019 (UTC)

Slaves Life

Hey Fredhot16, I noticed that you worked on Slaves Life a couple of times previously. Recently I adopted that story and started a reimagined version of it on CHYOA (renamed to Life of a Slave), which currently gets a lot more viewers than this site and has a few additional flexibilities when it comes to interactive fiction. Especially since this site tends to be a bit unstable.

Anyway, I was wondering if you'd like to collab with me on CHYOA and help out with the story, particularly on adapting Willow's route. If you're interested, hit me up. --Durzan 15:18, 19 April 2020 (UTC)

Sure, no problem. Here's the link (chyoa.com/story/Life-of-a-Slave.27660). Your gonna have to create an account and send me a message on there (same username over there for me), otherwise I can't add your username to the editor list.

I can easily relate to the bad work ethic, lol.

P.S. Its called that because I think it sounds a tad better than "Slaves Life" IMHO. If you want an in story reason, well... guess we'll just have to write and find out :D. My initial thought is that the main character is intimately involved with the life of his newly purchased slave, and thus he's witnessing first hand what its like to be a slave, even as he trains, sleeps with, and controls her. I kinda see this story as a bit of a romance. Gives the story added depth behind it, which is always a plus for any kind of story, erotic or otherwise. --Durzan 00:40, 25 April 2020 (UTC)

Okay, got you added in as an editor. Plus, I sent you a direct message on CHYOA. --Durzan 21:36, 25 April 2020 (UTC)

Main Page

I had to put protections against editing on the Main Page due to a persistent vandal. I may take the protections off again, as things seem to have calmed down. --Platypus 14:40, 16 October 2021 (UTC)

DirtyMeStoryTime

lol, yeah, been a while. I don't actually come here. Just, some of the stories around make me feel physically ill. I know, it isn't you, or Platy, or Tee. I ended up moving my writings to discord.

Yes, my bathroom door was fixed. That was the second time. Fortunately, it hasn't broken again. Glass bathroom door, so it shattered into lots of pieces those two times.

As for CYOA style, I think that may be a bit why I disappeared. I think I just write better linearly. As for the choice aspect, I guess it depends on the viewpoint. If you are writing a character viewpoint, then yes, it should be more about their reactions to the events that happen around them. However, there is the other, where the viewer is more of a "god" type of thing, like a civilization game or whatever. Rather than figuring out how the character reacts to stimulus, you instead figure out what happens to the character. I guess it depends on what kind of story you are writing. However, yeah, I think a majority focuses on what the character does and how they react, rather than what happens to the character, which I would completely agree with your viewpoint. --Dirty Me 03:42, 7 December 2021 (UTC)

Sure. I don't stop in often, but do time to time. --Dirty Me 07:35, 24 January 2022 (UTC)

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