Create Your Own Story - User contributions [en]

Waifu Quest/rel2

Zunface — Mon, 02 Jun 2014 00:22:03 GMT

Zunface:

"...I see." Your waifu looks sad, but also resolved, like she knew this was coming. 
"I'm really sorry." You look at your knees. "We can still hang out, of course..." 
"Yeah." She pats the back of your hand. "Listen, it's been really fun." 
"I know... I know. Same to you."

It hurts being away from her. But you heal, and you move on. You see other girls. You try living in new places. And you keep in touch with your waifu. You're no longer living with her, but she's still as easy to talk to as ever. You start to realize that the two of you work much better as friends than as lovers.

Some years pass. You have a wife (that's 'wife,' not 'waifu') and children now. You sit in your lovely backyard, relaxing after a summer barbecue with the family, when you get a text. It's from your waifu--she hopes you're doing well. She's having a great time in Switzerland. She's sent you some vacation photos. They look awesome.

Your kid walks up to you and asks who you're texting with. 
"My very best friend," you reply.

GAME OVER-- You scored 854 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage3

Zunface — Mon, 02 Jun 2014 00:19:12 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You try the front window--locked. Damn your paranoia. But there's a back window, if you can just sidle around the edge of the building--maybe you can scootch along the pipes... …'

You try the front window--locked. Damn your paranoia. But there's a back window, if you can just sidle around the edge of the building--maybe you can scootch along the pipes...

Problem ''is,'' those are ''steam'' pipes! No, I don't know what steam pipes are doing on the side of a normal apartment building either. Point is, your hands get horribly burned and you fall and die. By the time the cops find your body, feral dogs have already eaten your genitalia. And the replacement the funeral home makes for you is WAY too small.

GAME OVER-- You scored 218 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/sex3

Zunface — Mon, 02 Jun 2014 00:15:30 GMT

Zunface:

The bum freezes at your question. Somewhere in his meth-holed brain, a certain synapse fires for the first time in many years. Images of places and people long gone swirl down over his retinas. The endless jungle of Vietnam. Mosquito bites. Droplets of rain lost in the choking humidity. A dark figure slipping into view through a curtain of vines. Everyone is supposed to be bivouacked. But you can never know for sure. 
"The password!" Fingers tighten around the M16. 
"Edsel!" The voice sounds foreign. But it's impossible to be sure. The jungle plays tricks on the ears-- 
"That was last week's password! What's the password?" 
"Edsel, I say!" 
"No, god dammit! The pass--" 
And then everything goes up in flame and noise and screams. Saboteurs. He should've--if only--

"I'll ''tell'' you what a Studebaker is, Commie scum!" With military-trained reflexes, he seizes you around the throat. You never have a chance. By the time the bum regains himself, you're dead and he's on a train to the next county over.

GAME OVER-- You scored 14 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

All Adult Stories

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:56:42 GMT

Zunface: /* T - W */

==Adult Stories==
'''Alphabetize your entries please'''
(If you don't see your story here anymore, please check [[Pit of Abandoned Stories]], since the old, unfinished stories with few pages have been moved there)

----

'''FOR 18+:''' No limits to content.

==# - C==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes
|-
|[[The 007 Stories]] ||51|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Abandoned Adult Story]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Abandoned Adult Story}}||(Do not edit without permission. You can ask me at: [[User talk:DirtyMeStoryTime]])
|-
|[[Adventure at the TG Thriftshop]] (GenderBending)||{{PAGESINCAT:Adventure at the TG Thriftshop}}|| (Public; Please Add!) Updated 5/21/2014
|-
|[[Adventures of Valour]]||13|| (WIP Do not edit)
|-
|[[Alien Adventure]]||21||(Public)
|-
|[[All Alone]] (Lesbian)||111||(Public)
|-
|[[All in the Family]]||141|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Amazon]] ||45|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Android Training]]||2||(Private)
|-
|[[+annabeth|Annabeth]]||21||(Public)
|-
|[[An Airplane Journey]]||15||(Public)
|-
|[[Angorea]]||2||(A new, story-heavy adventure - Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 12/28/2013, only 2 pages.
|-
|[[Another Day At School...]] ||94||(Public)
|-
|[[Anime School]]||51||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[The Answer Is Yes]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Answer Is Yes}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[Archie's Gay Adventure]] (Gay)||88|| (Public)
|-
|[[Archie's Sexual Adventure]]||91||(Public)
|-
|[[Ardenstone]]||42|||(Do Not Edit) W.I.P. - Day 1 complete, plenty more to come!
|-
|[[Assassin]]||21|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Assassin's Guild]]||2||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 9/30/2013, only 2 pages.
|-
|[[Badlands]]||25|| (Public)
|-
|[[Band Forming thing|Band Forming Thing]]||123||(Public)
|-
|[[Beach Vacation]]||63||(Public)
|-
|[[Beachside Holiday]]||37||(Public)
|-
|[[Benighted]]||10|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[A Big Ugly Story]]||24|| (Public)
|-
|[[Big Brother Drama]] (gay) ||1|| (Private)
|-
|[[Big Cock Fun]] (Gay)||47||(Under Construction)(Create new pages if you want, just please leave the originals alone.)
|-
|[[Birthday Bottom Boy's Blackout Bar-night]] (Gay)||1,032||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Bi-sexual Sex stories|Bi-Sexual Sex Stories]]||150||(Public)
|-
|[[Blackguards and Bondage]]||14||(WIP: Please Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Blackmailed]]||345||(Public)
|-
|[[Blessed Union]]||43||(WIP: Please Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Blue Mountain University]]||129||(Public)
|-
|[[Boarding School Magic]]||48||(Public)
|-
|[[Boarding School Whores]]||28||(WIP)
|-
|[[+Boy Scouts Bi-Sexual Bangup]] ||44||(Please Do Not Edit
|-
|[[Brood]]||6|| (Private)||Pit watchlist, last edit 11/25/2013, only 6 pages.
|-
|[[The Breeding Games]]||88||(Public)
|-
|[[Bridget Vs. I-No]]||W.I.P.||(Please do not edit just yet)
|-
|[[Camp to Remember]] (Gay)||20||(Public)
|-
|[[Catgirl Adventures]]||14|| (Do Not Edit New story! One ending so far. 2/8/14)
|-
|[[Cecilia]]||20||(Public)
|-
|[[Celebrities!]]||40||(Public)
|-
|[[Cellar Door]]||23||(Public)
|-
|[[Cheer Camp]]||7||(Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 11/27/2013, only 7 pages.
|-
|[[Choose Your Destiny]]||91||(Public)
|-
|[[+Coda the Gay Sex God|Coda the Gay Sex God]]||2||(Please Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 12/24/2013, only 2 pages.
|-
|[[College: A Virgin's Fantasy]]||60|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[College Girls]]||{{PAGESINCAT:College Girls}}||(Public)
|-
|[[+College Revamped]]||11||(Don't Edit)
|-
|[[College Threesome FFM - Denial and Teasing]]|| Under Construction || (Please Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Corrupt me]]|| 1 || (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Country Girl]]|| 45 || (Public)
|-
|[[Cousin cunts]]|| wip || work in progress
|-
|[[A Craigslist Adventure]]|| WIP || (Public) read writers notes at bottom of page W.I.P
|-
|[[Curse of the Royals]]||7|| (Private)
|-
|}

==D - G==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes
|-
|[[Days in the Life of Sammy Simm]]||45||(Public)
|-
|[[Deadman Wonderland]]||14||(Feel free to edit, 1 writer per branch of sin+personality combo)
|-
|[[Death Will Come]] ||43|| (Public)
|-
|[[Decisions]]||25|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Demon's Host]]||29|| {Do Not Edit}
|-
|[[ Deutsche Geschichten]]||20||(Public)
|-
|[[Desert Island]] ||63|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Devils Daughter|The Devil's Daughter]] ||594||(Public)
|-
|[[Dirty Me]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Dirty Me}}||(Public) (Please ask before editing and read [[Dirty Me/Info|this]]) W.I.P
|-
|[[Double-Blind Desire]]||5||(Private)(new author, WIP until I can build solid foundation)||Pit watchlist, last edit 9/19/2013, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Down The Rabbit Hole]]||362||(Hail Eris!) (Public)
|-
|[[Downfall]]||({{PAGESINCAT:Downfall}}) WIP || (Please do not add or edit anything but spelling mistakes)
|-
|[[Dragon Life]]||3|| (Public)
|-
|[[Dread]]||104||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Druglord]]||27|| (Public)
|-
|[[Dungeons and Dragons]]||316||(Public)
|-
|[[The Echidna Tale]] (Monster girl, transformation)||40|| (Public)
|-
|[[Erotic Adventures of a Gentleman Spy]]||17|| (private - Do Not Edit Please!)||Pit watchlist, last edit 12/29/2013, only 17 pages.
|-
|[[erotic life|Erotic Life]]||29||(w.i.p.)(Public)(please edit)
|-
|[[The Ever Changing World In Which I Live]]||12|| (Do Not Edit Yet Please)||Pit watchlist, last edit 11/8/2013, only 12 pages.
|-
|[[Extraordinary life of a not so common teenager|Extraordinary Life of a Not So Common Teenager]]||51|| (Public)
|-
|[[Exotic Island]]||WIP|| (Do Not Edit Yet Please)
|-
|[[Faith's punishment]]||WIP (growing daily)||(Public)
|-
|[[The Family Dog]] || WIP {{PAGESINCAT:The Family Dog}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[family guy|Family Guy]]||4||(Public)
|-
|[[Family Ties]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Family Ties}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[Family Possession]]||41||(Public)
|-
|[[The Family Secret]]||5||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Fantasy Life]]||63||(Can be as crazy as you want it to be. Please go out of your way to make sure that all contributions use proper grammar. Any contributions with poor grammar will be deleted promptly.)
|-
|[[Fantasy Sex]]||{{PAGESINCAT: Fantasy Sex}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Finky's Mansion]] ||{{PAGESINCAT:Finky's Mansion}}||(WIP Do not edit)
|-
|[[First Day At College]](Gay)||{{PAGESINCAT:First Day At College}}||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Freedom Keeper]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Freedom Keeper}}||(Public)(Please Edit and add more pages, just keep it realistic!)
|-
|[[Freshman Dream]] ||{{PAGESINCAT:Freshman Dream}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Freshman Year]] ||{{PAGESINCAT:Freshman Year}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Friday night|Friday Night]] ||49||(Public)
|-
|[[Fuck Your Friend]] ||{{PAGESINCAT:Fuck Your Friend}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Fucking Classy]] ||{{PAGESINCAT:Fucking Classy}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Furries and Sex]]||3||Public
|-
|[[Furry Fling]]||8||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 9/16/2013, only 8 pages.
|-
|[[Furry World]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Furry World}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Furry Fantasy]]||0||( Not public yet still in set up WIP ''read guide before posting'')
|-
|[[Futa Club]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Futa Club}}|| (private)
|-
|[[Futa Kingdom]] ||10|| (Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 10/29/2013, only 10 pages.
|-
|[[Game of Thrones]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Game of Thrones}}||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 9/24/2013, only 7 pages.
|-
|[[Gay Academy]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Gay Academy}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Gay Middle School Sex]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Gay Middle School Sex}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Gay School Fun]]||8||(Public)||Pit watchlist, only 8 pages
|-
|[[A Gifted Woman]]||5|| (Public)||Pit watchlist, 1 page edited 1/25/2014, other pages 2011-2012, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Getting a job|Getting a Job]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Getting a job}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Generic Fantasy: The Erotic Adventure]]||5||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edited 11/25/2013, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[The Ghost of the Mansion]]|| {{PAGESINCAT:The Ghost of the Mansion}} || (Public)
|-
|[[Girl Island]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Girl Island}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[A girl on girl MY FIRST TIME|A Girl on Girl: My First Time]] (Lesbian)||{{PAGESINCAT:A girl on girl MY FIRST TIME}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[Girl Scout Cookies]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Girl Scout Cookies}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[Girl Scout Camp]] (The Sequel)||{{PAGESINCAT:Girl Scout Camp}}|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Girls are your Playthings|The Girls Are Your Playthings]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Girls are your Playthings}}||(WIP) (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Girlngirl High]] (Lesbian)||{{PAGESINCAT:Girlngirl High}}||(Public) Updated 4/16/2014||'''Mostly''' complete. See first page discussion for details
|-
|[[Girly Boy]] (bi)||20|| (WIP)
|-
|[[Good son]] (bi) ||{{PAGESINCAT:Good son}}|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Goodbye]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Goodbye}}||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[The Greatest Weekend Ever]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Greatest Weekend Ever}}|| (Public)
|-
|}

==H - K==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes
|-
|[[Hailey The Whore]]||35
|-
|[[The Hallway of infinity|The Hallway of Infinity]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Hallway of infinity}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Halo: After Reach]] ||9||(Public)(but do not edit)||Pit watchlist, last edited 2/20/2014, only 9 pages.
|-
|[[Hardon High]] (Gay)||{{PAGESINCAT:Hardon High}}||(Public)
|-
|[[The Harem]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Harem}}||(WIP, Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Harry Potter and the Connubialis Hex]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Harry Potter and the Connubialis Hex}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Hentai]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Hentai}} ||(Public)
|-
|[[Harry Potter and the Years of Sex]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Harry Potter and the Years of Sex}}|| (Public (Add all you want))
|-
|[[Harry Potter: Master]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Harry Potter: Master}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Heroes of Pleasure| Heroes of Pleasure]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Heroes of Pleasure}}||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[High School: Getting Lucky]]||{{PAGESINCAT:High School: Getting Lucky}}||(Public) WIP
|-
|[[High School]]||500+||(Public)
|-
|[[A High School Fantasy]]||15 ||(Public)
|-
|[[High School: A new beginning|High School: A New Beginning]]||18||(Public)
|-
|[[High School Redux‎‎]]||14||(Public)
|-
|[[High School: The Way It Should Have Been]]|| 60|| (Public)
|-
|[[Hipster Girl Exposed]]|| - || Not yet open to public
|-
|[[His Gay Life]] (Bi)||{{PAGESINCAT:His Gay Life}}||(Do Not Edit) (See the discussions page for more details)
|-
|[[Hollywood Romp]]||26|| (Public)
|-
|[[Hooker life|Hooker Life]]||15+|| (Public)
|-
|[[Homecoming]]||6|| (Private, Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edited 2/27/2014, only 6 pages.
|-
|[[Homeland]]||NEW|| (Public)
|-
|[[Home Early]]|| 45||(Public)
|-
|[[Horned Devil]]||23||(WIP)
|-
|[[Hot and Horny]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Hot and Horny}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Hot Mom]]||11||(Public)(Incest)(Don't edit existing pages.)||Pit watchlist, last edited 12/16/2013, only 11 pages.
|-
|[[The House on Horny Hill]]|| 20 || W.I.P. Not yet open to public
|-
|[[The Humiliation of Katie]]||{{PAGESINCAT:The Humiliation of Katie}}||(Public)
|-
|[[Hunger Games]]||3||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edited 8/1/2013, only 3 pages.
|-
|[[Hunger Games : Sex addition|Hunger Games: Sex Addition]]||12||(Public)(Please edit, use good grammar)
|-
|[[Hush (Under Construction)|Hush]] (Under Construction)||22||(Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[ICarly: sex adventure]]||WIP||(Public)
|-
|[[Icarly: Iwant sex|iCarly: iWant Sex]]|| 309 ||(Public)
|-
|[[I'll Be Gentle...]]|| 50+ ||(Public)
|-
|[[Im just a boy|I'm just a boy]]||9||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 10/22/2013, only 9 pages.
|-
|[[ Important News]]|| 0 || private W.I.P DO NOT EDIT
|-
|[[Incubus]] (Bisexual Pirate Fantasy)||41 ||(Public)
|-
|[[inevitable]]||4||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 8/11/2013, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[+Infinity]] ||{{PAGESINCAT:+Infinity}}||(Public)||Moved, please don't try to put your story on top by adding + to it.
|-
|[[Interracial Extravganza]]|| 200||(Public) W.I.P (Any editing welcome, make all stories about interracial sex, only good spelling and grammar.)
|-
|[[In Our Bath]] ||15|| (Private)||Pit watchlist, last edit 9/9/2013, only 15 pages.
|-
|[["In space no one can hear you breed"|In Space No One Can Hear You Breed]]|| 31 || (Public)
|-
|[[Invisible]]||45 ||(Public)
|-
|[[Invisible Boy]]||14|| (Public) ||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/13/2014, only 7 pages.
|-
|[[Jackie's Dilemma's]]||2||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 2/11/2014, only 2 pages.
|-
|[[Jade Rogue]]||13 ||(Public)
|-
|[[A Job]] || 40 || (Public)
|-
|[[Jessica's Choices]]||15|| (Under construction. Please Do not edit.)
|-
|[[Junior High]] ||17|| (Public)
|-
|[[Just Another Day]] ||31|| (Public)
|-
|[[Just Do It Already!]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Just Do It Already!}}||(Public)
|-
|[[ Kayla's Adventures: Party]]||9|| private, W.I.P.||Pit watchlist, last edit 11/30/2013, only 9 pages.
|-
|[[A Knight's Quest]]||16|| (Under construction. Do not edit yet.)||Pit watchlist, last edit 8/4/2013, only 16 pages.
|-
|[[KPOP Love Story]]|| 14+ || (Do not edit.)
|-
|}

==L - O==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes
|-
|[[Labyrinth of Lust]]||207|| (Public)
|-
|[[Lady Van Helsing]] ||101|| (Public)
|-
|[[Last day of school|Last Day of School]] ||13|| (Public)
|-
|[[Lara Croft: The Untold Tales]]||13||(Fuck this story, too hard to write. Not enough time. - Bojangles)
|-
|[[Legend of Krystal]]||61|| public
|-
|[[Legend of the Trailer Park]]||125||(Public)
|-
|[[Lesbian Parkour Club]]||4||(Public)
|-
|[[Let's Burn Down a Castle]]||248|| (Public)
|-
|[[Life+++]]||11||(Public)
|-
|[[The life of a medieval princess|The Life of a Medieval Princess]]||400|| (Public - but please read the [[Princess Editor's Guide]]. Mainly focused around the story with an erotic background and occasional sexual encounters. Might contain extreme violence and mutilation if you (or someone else) screws up during a fight.)
|-
|[[The Life of Others ]]||14
|-
|[[The Life of Cassie]]||5||(Public but Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/22/2014, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Life of Unlimited Chances]]||12 ||(Public)
|-
|[[Life of a 13 year old|Life of a 13 Year Old]]|| 315|| (Do Not Edit, Update Jan, 25, 2014)
|-
|[[Life of a sexy Nerd|Life of a sexy Nerd]]||10||public
|-
|[[Life of a pedo|Life of a pedo]] ||3|| (W.I.P)(DON'T EDIT)||Pit watchlist, last edit 3/9/2014, only 3 pages.
|-
|[[Lost in the city|Lost in the City]]||41||(W.I.P)(Public)
|-
|[[Lucid dreams]]||13||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 10/5/2014, only 13 pages.
|-
|[[Lucky?]]||14|| Private||Pit watchlist, last edit 10/11/2013, only 14 pages.
|-
|[[March of the Dark Elves]]||{{PAGESINCAT:March of the Dark Elves}} ||(Public)
|-
|[[Mage Games]] (Gay Fantasy)||31||(Public)
|-
|[[Marion]]||3||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/9/2014, only 3 pages.
|-
|[[Masked Crimes]]||13|| W.I.P., (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Mass Effect: Sex Edition]]||19|| W.I.P., (Public, but please have prior gaming knowledge of the Mass Effect series)
|-
|[[Megan:Menu|Megan]] (An Exercise In Violence)||24|| complete. Do not edit.
|-
|[[Melanie and Michael]]||14|| W.I.P., (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Medieval Fun]]||14|| (Private) W.I.P DO NOT EDIT AON!
|-
|[[Meet'n'fuck Beach Vacation]]||34||(Public)
|-
|[[Meet the Kirks]]||7||(WIP. Do not edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 2/14/2014, only 7 pages.
|-
|[[Middle School]]||26||(WIP)
|-
||[[Mind Control]]|| WIP || private (DO NOT EDIT)
|-
|[[The Mind Controlling Device]]||31||(Public)
|-
|[[Misfortunes of an Asian College Girl]]||18||(Public)
|-
|[[ Moms can be bad]]|| W.I.P. || public (I welcome you to add to this story i hope to see what you all come up with)
|-
|[[My wish]]||4||public||Pit watchlist, last edit 9/11/2013, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[Naruto: Power of Mind]]||5||(Private)(Don't edit but you can contribute)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/25/2014, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Neighborhood]]||33||(Public
|-
|[[The New God]] ||145||(Public)
|-
|[[New Life in some way]]||28||(Public)
|-
|[[Ninja Kittehs From Space!]]||22||(Public)
|-
|[[Not So Average Alex]]||8||( Public (gay) )||Pit watchlist, last edit 8/17/2013, only 8 pages.
|-
|[[Numbers]]||27||(Kinda Public)
|-
|[[Obscura]]||136||(Public)(Please add pages!)
|-
|[[Occupational Therapy]] (Gay)||24||(Public)
|-
|[[Ongoing Story]] ||560||(Some paths finished, others are work in Progress)
|-
|[[Oops! You're Naked!]] ||284||(Public)
|-
|[[The Ordinary Life of a Prostitute]]||13||(Public)
|-
|[[Organized Crime]]||36||(W.I.P, Please Edit, No spelling/grammar errors allowed.)
|-
|}

==P - S==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes
|-
|[[the patchwork universe|The Patchwork Universe]]||2|| (Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 2/2/2014, only 10 pages.
|-
|[[patriarch's legacy|Patriarch's Legacy]]||10||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 8/27/2013, only 10 pages.
|-
|[[Pedo Plushie|The Adventures of a Pedo Plushie]]||26|| (Public)
|-
|[[Pedo romp]]||378||(Public)||
|-
|[[Percy Jackson & Friends]]||32||(Public)
|-
|[[Percy Jackson God Of All]]||11|| (Private, WIP) (Please do not edit yet Updated March 17th, 2014)
|-
|[[Pervert]]||72||(Public)
|-
|[[Perverted Thirteen-Year-Old]]||96|| (Public)
|-
|[[Phineas and Ferb: The Erotic Adventures]]||17|| (Public)
|-
|[[Pi Pi Pi]]||304|| (Public)
|-
|[[Pimp]]||81|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Pimping Your Roommate]] ||3||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 10/27/2013, only 3 pages.
|-
|[[Pokemon: Gotta Sex 'em all! Kanto Edition]]||27|| (W.I.P., Private)
|-
|[[Pokemon: Sexy Version]]||12||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/20/2014, only 12 pages.
|-
|[[Pokemon: XY]]||0+|| (W.I.P., Public but only for those with decent grammar)
|-
|[[Pokesex]]||245|| (Public)
|-
|[[A portrait of an American Girl Named Myra|A Portrait of an American Girl Named Myra]]||72|| (Public)
|-
|[[Possessed]]||141|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Power of Will]]||60|| (W.I.P) (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Princess Problems]]||7||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 2/25/2014, only 7 pages.
|-
|[[Public Nudity]]||29|| ((Public))
|-
|[[Punishment for your wife]]||149|| (Public)
|-
|[[ The Punishment of Claire and Cassandra ]]||116|| (***NEW*** You play a Sheriff who punishes his teenage daughter and her best friend - Please Do Not Edit - Comments welcome on talk page)
|-
|[[Queen of Lust]]||2||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 11/22/2013, only 2 pages.
|-
|[[The Quest For Treguards Treasure]]||274|| (Public)
|-
|[[Rampage]]||{{PAGESINCAT:Rampage}}|| (Public-but any contributions with poor grammar will be immediately deleted)
|-
|[[Red Mobster]]||67|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Resort]]||W.I.P|| (Please Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[School Fun]]||57||(Public)
|-
|[[Der Schulleiter]]||4|| (Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/31/2014, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[Sex Adventure]]||49|| (W.I.P) (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Sex and other Addictions]]||5||(Private)||Pit watchlist, last edit 12/15/2013, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Sex in Ancient Rome]]||7||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/11/2014, only 7 pages.
|-
|[[The Sexual Adventures of You]]||119|| (Public)
|-
|[[Sexy World]]||31|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Shin Calibur]]||9||(Don't Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 2/9/2014, only 9 pages.
|-
|[[SHEMALE SORRORITY]]|| W.I.P. || public Feel Free to Edit. Try to link together...
|-
|[[Sissies love black cock]] || 83 || (Public W.I.P)
|-
|[[Sister Complex]] || W.I.P || (Public - No guro)
|-
|[[sisters]]||4||(do not edit yet)||Pit watchlist, last edit 11/30/2013, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[Sisters and other Victims]]||{{PAGESINCAT:SAOV}} || (Public)
|-
|[[Skyrim: A Sexual Adventure]]||4||(Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 8/13/2013, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[Slasher]]||20+||(Public)
|-
|[[The Slave Mansion]]||3|| (Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 10/30/2013, only 3 pages.
|-
|[[Slave to the Mist]]|| 40+ || (Public)
|-
|[[Smutty Sex Romp]]|| {{PAGESINCAT:Smutty Sex Romp}} || (Public-For experienced writers with a firm grasp of grammar and spelling only. Any contributions with poor grammar will be immediately deleted)
|-
|[[Snuff]]||Under Construction || (Work In Progress) (Public)
|-
|[[SpaceShip5EX]] ||50 || (Work In Progress) (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Special Agent 0069]]||8|| (W.I.P. - Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[SSS]]||15|| private
|-
|[[Star Girl Fighters Erotic Noval Diary: Stories Fantasy]]||16|| (W.I.P DON'T EDIT)
|-
|[[Star Trek: A Night with Troi]]||35|| (Public)
|-
|[[Star Trek: Jadzia's Adventure]]||81|| (Do Not Edit. Ask [[User talk:Kenny24|here]] if you would like to add)
|-
|[[Star Wars: The Complete Erotic Saga]]||896|| (Public)
|-
|[[Stalker]]||184||(Public)
|-
|[[The Story of Jack Foster]]||341|| (Public)
|-
|[[Summer Party]]||34||(Public)
|-
|[[Super Power Fantasy]] ||14|| (Public)
|-
|[[Super Sex Adventure]] ||2|| (Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last i 9/6/2013, only 2 pages.
|-
|[[Supershifter]] ||14|| (Public)
|-
|[[Survive]] ||21|| (Public)
|-
|[[Survival Story]] ||65|| (Public)
|-
|[[Superhero?]] ||38|| (Public. Please Contribute/Edit )||Updated May 31st, 2014. 4 new page
|-
|}

==T - W==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes
|-
|[[The Tease]]||22|| (Public)
|-
|[[Teen Years]]||36|| (Private)(Site Under Construction, access denied; additions will be removed)
|-
|[[Teenager]] ||141|| (Public)
|-
||[[A Teens Great Times]]|| WIP || private
|-
|[[Temptation]]||17|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Testing Facility #80085]]||25||(Public)
|-
|[[Theme Park]]||15|| (Private)
|-
|[[The Long Road to Graduation]] || 10 || (Private)(W.I.P)
|-
|[[This Is You(Gay)]]||16|| (W.I.P)
|-
|[[This Story Will Piss You Off]]||60|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Time Lord]]||13|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Town]]||14|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Transformation Laboratory]]||28|| ((Public)
|-
|[[To Pee or not To Pee]]||5|| private for now, please don't edit||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/4/2014, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Tori and the space creature]]||10|| (Public)
|-
|[[Tree of Doom]] ||40|| (Public)
|-
|[[Truth or Dare Game]]||20|| (Public make it good)
|-
|[[Twisted Family]]||5||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 3/26/2014, only 5 pages.
|-
|[[Ty's Story]] ||146|| (Public)
|-
|[[University Daze]]||727|| (Public)
|-
|[[Unlucky Girl]]||16|| (Public, Please Edit)
|-
|[[Unwritten/Starting the story|Unwritten]] || {{PAGESINCAT:Unwritten}} || (Public) - If you are unfamiliar with how to create/edit pages, please use the [[Pit of Abandoned Stories]] as training material.
|-
|[[Vampire Weekend]]||331|| (Public)
|-
|[[Verse]]||22|| (WIP; Conditionally Public, please only contribute/edit if you're good friends with the English language.)
|-
|[[Victim]]||332|| (Public)
|-
|[[Victorious: Behind the Scenes]]||103|| (Public)(Please add pages!)
|-
|[[Waifu Quest]]||51||(Private, W.I.P.)
|-
|[[Waking up in a Mansion]]||26|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Walt Jizzney's Magic Kingdom]]||66|| (Public)
|-
|[[War Pigs]]||82|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[War and Sex]]||211|| (Public)
|-
|[[Warped]]||12|| (Public)
|-
|[[Washed Up]] ||1|| (Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Wee Willy Walkins at the Circus]]||1||(Private WIP, Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Whore it Out]]||121|| (Public)
|-
|[[The Whore House]]||10|| (WIP, but please feel free to add)
|-
|[[Wish Coin]]||82|| (Public)
|-
|[[Wild Times]]||33|| (Do not edit)
|-
|[[Witch of Egypt]]||18|| (Public - Please read the instructions on the first page, follow the guidelines or risk deletion!)
|-
|[[Witch's Power]]||42|| (do not edit)
|-
|[[Work Attire]]||173|| (Public)
|-
|[[The World Of Monster]]||9||(Please Do Not Edit)||Pit watchlist, last edit 12/11/2013, only 9 pages.
|-
|[[World of Wolves]] ||79|| (Public)
|-
|[[Wrestling X-rated]]||32|| (Public)
|-
|}

==X - Z==
{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Notes

|-
|[[XXX Sorority Sisters]]||4||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/14/2014, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[ Yakyuken Quest]]|| 4 || ( W.I.P., Public, but please do not edit)
|-
|[[Yes, Yes, Yes, Your Honor]] ||261||(Public)
|-
|[[You Are An Orc]] || 468|| {Public, please read guidelines in the discussion}
|-
|[[You Disappear]] ||46|| (Public though please do not edit Female Under 18 8 branch
|-
|[[Young Love]] ||29|| (Under Construction Please Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Young Teen on her way home]] ||20|| (Under Construction)
|-
|[[Your Best Friend's Younger Sister]]||141|| (Public - Use Proper Grammar Please)
|-
|[[Your Reality Ring]]||9|| WIP (Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 1/30/2014, only 1 page edited, rest last edited 12/17/2013, only 4 pages.
|-
|[[Your Queer Weekend Adventure]]||20|| (Under Construction Please Do Not Edit)
|-
|[[Your Brother's Girlfriend]]||16||(Public) (You may edit but Keep the main characters)
|-
|[[Youth Pastor]] ||3||(Public) (please add what you want, but leave the main characters)||Pit watchlist, last edit 3/27/2014, only 3 pages.
|-
|[[The Zoo]] (Gay Furry) ||74|| (Public)
|-
|[[Zombie Rampage]]||3||(Public)||Pit watchlist, last edit 12/10/2013, only 3 pages.
|-
|}

== Poor Taste Stories ==

'''FOR 21+''' No limits to content. Don't blame us.

{| class="wikitable sortable" style="width:100%"
|-
! Story !! Number Of Pages !! Note
|-
|[[Chimpout]]||20|| WIP DON'T EDIT
|-
|[[Fuckin Screwed Up]]||122|| Work On It, It's Public
|-
|[[Molest Little Boys]] ||18||(Work On It, It's Public)
|-
|[[One Messed Up Day]]||22
|-
|[[One Messed Up Story]]||220|| Work On It, It's Public
|-
|[[S.W.A.T.]]||23||(Just Started, PLEASE HELP WITH IDEAS, ITS PUBLIC)
|-
|[[Terror in Tibet]]||31||(DO NOT EDIT)
|-
|[[Would You, Could You, Fuck A Goat?!]]||15||(Work On It(please), It's Public)
|}

[[Category:System Pages]]
[[Category:Adult Stories]]

Waifu Quest/rel3b

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:54:51 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Well, it's the only honorable way out. Your knife sinks deep into your stomach, spilling your entrails all over the girl's bed. "What the hell?!" she asks. It's not an unreas…'

Well, it's the only honorable way out. Your knife sinks deep into your stomach, spilling your entrails all over the girl's bed. 
"What the hell?!" she asks. It's not an unreasonable question. 
"Sorry, I need to regain my honor!" you explain. "By the way, you're supposed to eat a meal before you commit seppuku, so I went into your kitchen and had a can of pork and beans. Hope you don't mind!" 
"You ass! Those are organic, cage-free pork and beans! I get them flown in from Kansas for eight bucks a pop!" she yells. You don't hear her because you're dead. Seriously, though. That wasn't cool at all!

GAME OVER-- You scored 319 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/rel3

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:51:08 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You go to the dive bar you used to love when you were in college. It's not as loud and boisterous as it used to be. Lights not as bright, music not as jolly. In fact, there's onl…'

You go to the dive bar you used to love when you were in college. It's not as loud and boisterous as it used to be. Lights not as bright, music not as jolly. In fact, there's only one other customer there--a girl about your age, seated at the bar.

You sit down next to her and have the best chat you've had in a long time. You realize you both went to the same college, and in fact you sat just a couple rows apart in History 101. You joke about missed connections. You bond over your mutual love of IPAs and your mutual dislike of the Kardashians. She even likes your obscure joke about the original Metal Gear on the MSX. And by the end of the night, you're in bed together, with her body curled up against yours.

Well, shit. You just cheated on your waifu, my man! What are you gonna do now?
*[[Waifu Quest/rel2|Tell the truth and break up with your waifu]]
*[[Waifu Quest/rel3a|Pretend this evening never happened]]
*[[Waifu Quest/rel3b|Commit seppuku]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/rel4

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:44:45 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Great thinking! If you're not sure you love her, locking yourself into this relationship will fix everything, right? Right? ...Anyway, you should start thinking about how you're…'

Great thinking! If you're not sure you love her, locking yourself into this relationship will fix everything, right? Right?

...Anyway, you should start thinking about how you're going to buy her a ring. You really don't make all that much! Should you...
* [[Waifu Quest/rel4a|Buy a cubic zirconia ring?]]
* [[Waifu Quest/rel4b|Go out gambling?]]
* [[Waifu Quest/rel4c|Rob a bank?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/rel2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:37:08 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"...I see." Your waifu looks sad, but also resolved, like she knew this was coming. "I'm really sorry." You look at your knees. "We can still hang out, of course..." "Yea…'

"...I see." Your waifu looks sad, but also resolved, like she knew this was coming. 
"I'm really sorry." You look at your knees. "We can still hang out, of course..." 
"Yeah." She pats the back of your hand. "Listen, it's been really fun." 
"I know... I know. Same to you."

It hurts being away from her. But you heal, and you move on. You see other girls. You try living in new places. And you keep in touch with your waifu. You're no longer living with her, but she's still as easy to talk to as ever. You start to realize that the two of you work much better as friends than as lovers.

Some years pass. You have a wife (that's 'wife,' not 'waifu') and children now. You sit in your lovely backyard, relaxing after a summer barbecue with the family, when you get a text. It's from your waifu--she hopes you're doing well. She's having a great time in Switzerland. She's sent you some vacation photos. They look awesome.

Your kid walks up to you and asks who you're texting with. 
"My very best friend," you reply.

GAME OVER-- You scored 999 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/relationship

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:29:55 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Your waifu ends up moving in with you. She gets a job as a translator that lets her stay at home, and when you come home every day, there she is in nothing but an apron, with din…'

Your waifu ends up moving in with you. She gets a job as a translator that lets her stay at home, and when you come home every day, there she is in nothing but an apron, with dinner ready for you. She uses her spare time to make friends with the neighbors and keep the HOA off your back. She even makes a decal for your car window featuring your face and hers inside a stylized heart.

...So why are you feeling so unfulfilled? You're down to having sex maybe once a week, and even then it feels more like a chore than anything. You hardly talk to one another, except in grunts and half-sentences. Whatever's going on, something needs to change. Will you:
* [[Waifu Quest/rel1|Try something new in bed]]
* [[Waifu Quest/rel2|Break up with her]]
* [[Waifu Quest/rel3|Go to a bar and think]]
* [[Waifu Quest/rel4|Marry her]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/movie1

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:15:50 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You watch Steel Magnolias together with your waifu. She cries at the sad parts, you comfort her, she leans into your strong, broad chest, it's a good time. Anyway you watch a few…'

You watch Steel Magnolias together with your waifu. She cries at the sad parts, you comfort her, she leans into your strong, broad chest, it's a good time. Anyway you watch a few more things after that, play some board games, then she sees that the last subway has already gone, so she decides to spend the night at your place!

* [[Waifu Quest/relationship|I like the sound of that!]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/movie4a

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:12:42 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You close your eyes and focus, putting yourself in another place, another time... You're sitting at your computer, at home... * Continue... [[Category:Waifu Que…'

You close your eyes and focus, putting yourself in another place, another time... You're sitting at your computer, at home...

* [[Waifu Quest|Continue...]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/movie4

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:11:19 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Soon, you're sitting with your waifu, watching old episodes of Dawson's Creek. The writing is so shallow and the acting so flat. You can't take much more of this. What will you d…'

Soon, you're sitting with your waifu, watching old episodes of Dawson's Creek. The writing is so shallow and the acting so flat. You can't take much more of this. What will you do?

* [[Waifu Quest/movie4a|Close your eyes and go to your happy place]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/movie2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:08:23 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You take your waifu in to watch Braveheart! The combat is so exciting and Mel Gibson is so charismatic, even if his acts later in life retroactively cast a racist pall over the w…'

You take your waifu in to watch Braveheart! The combat is so exciting and Mel Gibson is so charismatic, even if his acts later in life retroactively cast a racist pall over the whole performance! But it's not really your waifu's thing. She dozes off a couple times and acts fidgety for the rest, but you're too engrossed in the action to see the signs. After the movie's done, your waifu offers to take the beer bottles out to the recycling. She doesn't come back.

Well, now what are you going to do?
* [[Waifu Quest/fb|Check your Facebook]]
* [[Waifu Quest/program|Get some programming done]]
* [[Waifu Quest/lewd|Look at lewd pictures]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/movie3

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:05:27 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You take her inside to watch ''Boku no Pico,'' the contemporary classic. As you're fawning over how moe Pico is, your waifu surreptitiously slips out, leaving her beer unfinished…'

You take her inside to watch ''Boku no Pico,'' the contemporary classic. As you're fawning over how moe Pico is, your waifu surreptitiously slips out, leaving her beer unfinished. Oh well, her loss. Pico is way cuter than her, anyway.

GAME OVER-- You scored 121 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/movies

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 23:03:31 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"Well, you're just in time," you tell her. "I was going to put on some Netflix and I could use a drink and some company." "Awesome." Your waifu smiles. "What are we watching?…'

"Well, you're just in time," you tell her. "I was going to put on some Netflix and I could use a drink and some company." 
"Awesome." Your waifu smiles. "What are we watching?"

* [[Waifu Quest/movie1|"Steel Magnolias."]]
* [[Waifu Quest/movie2|"Braveheart."]]
* [[Waifu Quest/movie3|"Boku no Pico."]]
* [[Waifu Quest/movie4|"Why don't you choose?"]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage2b

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:50:13 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Amazingly, she's not only cool with it, she invites you in! Man, you thought she'd be interested, and indeed she was! You must have mental powers or something. Be sure to use the…'

Amazingly, she's not only cool with it, she invites you in! Man, you thought she'd be interested, and indeed she was! You must have mental powers or something. Be sure to use them wisely!

Anyway, you have sex with your neighbor and it's better than you thought! She may be old, her boobs may not hang as high anymore, but her lifetime of experience more than makes up for it. In fact, the sex is SO awesome you forget all about your waifu and shack up with Constance--because that's your neighbor's name--instead. When she dies ten years later, she leaves you a lot of money and a collection of vintage Coca-Cola posters in her will!

Great!

GAME OVER-- You scored 704 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage2a

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:45:28 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Your neighbor promptly passes out, splitting her head open on a collectible cat statue. Well, now you're facing manslaughter charges in addition to indecent exposure. Great job. …'

Your neighbor promptly passes out, splitting her head open on a collectible cat statue. Well, now you're facing manslaughter charges in addition to indecent exposure. Great job.

Your waifu testifies against you at the trial. She never even visits you in prison. Man, this sucks!

GAME OVER-- You scored 218 out of 1000 points
* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:43:31 GMT

Zunface:

You walk to the next apartment over and knock on the door. As you wait for someone to answer, you cover your crotch with both hands, doing this little self-conscious dance that for all practical purposes is indistinguishable from the gotta-pee dance.

Finally, your neighbor--a crotchety old lady, once a nurse-practitioner long ago, now just the head of the HOA and a frequent contributor to local cat newsletters--answers the door. Is she:
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage2a|Horrified?]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage2b|Interested?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:43:03 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You walk to the next apartment over and knock on the door. As you wait for someone to answer, you cover your crotch with both hands, doing this little self-conscious dance that f…'

You walk to the next apartment over and knock on the door. As you wait for someone to answer, you cover your crotch with both hands, doing this little self-conscious dance that for all practical purposes is indistinguishable from the gotta-pee dance.

Finally, your neighbor--a crotchety old lady, once a nurse-practitioner long ago, now just the head of the HOA and a frequent contributor to local cat newsletters--answers the door. Is she:
* [[bondage2a|Horrified?]]
* [[bondage2b|Interested?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage4

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:38:48 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You think for a moment, visualizing your room, her situation... then... "Hey, babe?" You tap on the door again. "You can touch the bedposts from where you are, right?" "U…'

You think for a moment, visualizing your room, her situation... then... 
"Hey, babe?" You tap on the door again. "You can touch the bedposts from where you are, right?" 
"Uh, yeah, with my fingertips," she calls back. "Why?" 
"The tops of the bedposts can be unscrewed," you tell her. "Take them off and you can just slip the rope right over the posts."

A few minutes later, your waifu opens the door for you, ropes dangling loose from her wrists. 
"Thank god for cheap beds, huh?" She pulls you into a kiss. 
"I'll write Ikea a nice letter after our shower..." you tell her, walking back inside.

* [[Waifu Quest/relationship|What a perfect evening!]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage1

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:32:00 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"Hey, sweetie?" You tap on the door. "This is going to sound bad, but... I'm locked out." "Well, what do you want me to do about it?" Your waifu's voice sounds faintly throug…'

"Hey, sweetie?" You tap on the door. "This is going to sound bad, but... I'm locked out." 
"Well, what do you want me to do about it?" Your waifu's voice sounds faintly through the door. "I'm still tied up, here!" 
"Ah, Jesus. Listen, just hold on tight while I..."

* [[Waifu Quest/bondage2|"...ask the neighbors for help."]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage3|"...try to get a window open."]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage4|"...think about how my bed is set up."]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/bondage

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 22:26:05 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You pull out the rope you've been saving for just such an occasion. Yes, you haven't forgotten what you learned in the Scouts--always be prepared. Preferably with a knot or two.<…'

You pull out the rope you've been saving for just such an occasion. Yes, you haven't forgotten what you learned in the Scouts--always be prepared. Preferably with a knot or two. 
"Oh..." Your waifu smiles coyly. "Is that for me?" 
"No, I was going to ask you to help me put up a hammock," you answer. "Of course it's for you. Come on in." 
"I thought you'd never ask." Your waifu follows you inside, closing the door with her heel.

An hour passes. You find yourself sitting on the side of your bed, gazing down at your waifu. There she lies, her slender limbs spread out, tied to the posts of your bed; her hair fans out over the sheets beneath her. She's still catching her breath, and her breasts heave gently, rhythmically, full and round and smooth in the sweat-scented air. Or she could be flat, if that's your thing. Not judging.

"That was amazing," you tell her as you lean down and kiss her. Her lip gloss tastes lightly of strawberry. 
"No, you were." She leans up to return the kiss--straining lightly at her bonds--and then lays her head back down, a satisfied flush splayed across her cheeks. "Wanna hit the shower together?" 
"Hell yes!" You nod. "Though let me just take out the condom trash first." 
"Ah, yeah, good call." Neither of you wants a banana slug getting ripe in your bedroom. "Don't take too long, okay?" 
You pat your waifu's cheek. "I'll be back before you can say 'Actually, it's pronounced ah-nee-may.'" 
"Actually, it's pronounced 'ah-nee-may.'" 
"Ha ha. See you in a sec." 

It's only a few short steps from your door to the building's garbage chute, so you don't bother getting dressed. You dump the condom trash, then you close the door to the garbage chute before the everpresent smell of puke can creep out into the hall. Smiling in self-satisfaction, you turn on your heel and...

Oh, shit. You don't have your keys. You're locked out in the hallway, naked. What will you do?
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage1|Ask your waifu for help]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage2|Ask your neighbor for help]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage3|Try to break back into your apartment]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizzawhere

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 21:51:33 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Your waifu blinks. "I, uh... I haven't seen him." "Oh. Listen, could you do me a big?" you ask. "The guy from Pizza Hovel is gonna be here in, like, two minutes. Could you go…'

Your waifu blinks. "I, uh... I haven't seen him." 
"Oh. Listen, could you do me a big?" you ask. "The guy from Pizza Hovel is gonna be here in, like, two minutes. Could you go down and let him in the front when he gets here?" 
"...sure," your waifu responds.

A little while later, the pizza man arrives!
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza|Open the door!]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/beer

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 21:48:57 GMT

Zunface:

"Miller Genuine Draft? Seriously?" you ask. "You're my fantasy and this is the best you can do?" 
"I... I thought you'd like it." Your waifu casts her eyes downward. 
"Well, you didn't do your research!" You sigh in exasperation. "You can't expect me to fuck you with a bunch of flavorless corn fluid sloshing around in my belly."

Your waifu rolls her eyes as you go on a long rant about ales and lagers and hop ratios and how Sam Adams should have been shot by the British, not for being a rebel, but for inventing Cherry Wheat. Eventually your waifu goes home and drinks the beer and reads sexy CYOA adventures to amuse herself. By the time you notice she's gone, you're expounding on the comparative merits of the various Trappist beers.

You write a long rant on Reddit about how women are all phony bitches because they don't appreciate your intellect.

GAME OVER-- You scored -1200 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/beer

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 21:48:22 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"Miller Genuine Draft? Seriously?" you ask. "You're my fantasy and this is the best you can do?" "I... I thought you'd like it." Your waifu casts her eyes downward. "Well…'

"Miller Genuine Draft? Seriously?" you ask. "You're my fantasy and this is the best you can do?" 
"I... I thought you'd like it." Your waifu casts her eyes downward. 
"Well, you didn't do your research!" You sigh in exasperation. "You can't expect me to fuck you with a bunch of flavorless corn fluid sloshing around in my belly."

Your waifu rolls her eyes as you go on a long rant about ales and lagers and hop ratios and how Sam Adams should have been shot by the British, not for being a rebel, but for inventing Cherry Wheat. Eventually your waifu goes home and drinks the beer by herself and reads sexy CYOA adventures to amuse herself. By the time you notice she's gone, you're expounding on the comparative merits of the various Trappist beers.

You write a long rant on Reddit about how women are all phony bitches because they don't appreciate your intellect.

GAME OVER-- You scored -1200 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/nope

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 21:41:22 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Before she can say another word, you close the door in her face. You aren't feeling like female company anyway. What do you want to do now? * [[Waifu Quest/fb|Check your Faceboo…'

Before she can say another word, you close the door in her face. You aren't feeling like female company anyway.

What do you want to do now?
* [[Waifu Quest/fb|Check your Facebook]]
* [[Waifu Quest/program|Get some programming done]]
* [[Waifu Quest/lewd|Look at lewd pictures]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/sex3

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 21:38:37 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'The bum freezes at your question. Somewhere in his meth-holed brain, a certain synapse fires for the first time in many years. Images of places and people long gone swirl down ov…'

The bum freezes at your question. Somewhere in his meth-holed brain, a certain synapse fires for the first time in many years. Images of places and people long gone swirl down over his retinas. The endless jungle of Vietnam. Mosquito bites. Droplets of rain lost in the choking humidity. A dark figure slipping into view through a curtain of vines. Everyone is supposed to bivouacked. But you can never know for sure. 
"The password!" Fingers tighten around the M16. 
"Edsel!" The voice sounds foreign. But it's impossible to be sure. The jungle plays tricks on the ears-- 
"That was last week's password! What's the password?" 
"Edsel, I say!" 
"No, god dammit! The pass--" 
And then everything goes up in flame and noise and screams. Saboteurs. He should've--if only--

"I'll ''tell'' you what a Studebaker is, Commie scum!" With military-trained reflexes, he seizes you around the throat. You never have a chance. By the time the bum regains himself, you're dead and he's on a train to the next county over.

GAME OVER-- You scored 14 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/sex2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:59:23 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"This? I fermented it from the tissues I'm always finding in your garbage," the bum explains. "It's kind of like a schnapps, if you will." You immediately projectile-vomit all o…'

"This? I fermented it from the tissues I'm always finding in your garbage," the bum explains. "It's kind of like a schnapps, if you will."

You immediately projectile-vomit all over the bum, the inside of the dumpster, your own legs, and the worried neighbor who comes to check on you, and you keep vomiting and vomiting until you die of dehydration.

GAME OVER-- You scored 3 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/sex1

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:56:42 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You thank the bum and climb out of the dumpster, thinking on what you've learned today. Sure, what happened to you today hurt, but it wasn't unique. People get their hearts broke…'

You thank the bum and climb out of the dumpster, thinking on what you've learned today. Sure, what happened to you today hurt, but it wasn't unique. People get their hearts broken all the time. But life goes on. Maybe you don't need a waifu to be happy. Maybe it's enough to be a decent person.

While you're thinking about that, the police come and arrest you. Turns out you never put your dick back, and a little kid saw. You are now on the sex offender registry. In just a couple minutes, you've locked yourself out of any job better than "Taco Bell night shift manager" or "Internet forum moderator."

Dang!

GAME OVER-- You scored 49 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/sex

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:50:24 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"Holy shit!" With waifu-like reflexes, she dodges your tackle and your dick impacts against the rusty iron railing outside your apartment door. Of course, Newton's First Law bei…'

"Holy shit!" With waifu-like reflexes, she dodges your tackle and your dick impacts against the rusty iron railing outside your apartment door.

Of course, Newton's First Law being what it is, the top half of your body continues moving, causing you to flip over the railing and fall five stories into a dumpster!

A hand shaking your shoulder awakens you. Not your waifu's hand--she's long since taken off to find an anon with more social graces than you. No, you find yourself looking up into the rheumy, meth-dilated eyes of the local bum. 
"Tough luck about the girl, kid," the bum says, offering you a drink. "Same thing happened to me in Tallahassee back in '83." 
"I'm sorry to hear that," you reply. You take a sip of the offered drink. It tastes like gasoline that a raccoon took a shit in. 
"Ahhhhh, not as sorry as you'd have been had you seen her." The bum sighs heavily. "Pink hair down to here, ass like a Studebaker."

It's about this point that you look down and notice the bum jerking himself off.

What do you do?
* [[Waifu Quest/sex1|Thank the bum and go home]]
* [[Waifu Quest/sex2|Ask what's in the drink]]
* [[Waifu Quest/sex3|Ask what a Studebaker is]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/waifu

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:34:56 GMT

Zunface:

Oh my goodness, it's your waifu--wearing a side-tie bikini and holding a six-pack of Miller Genuine Draft!

"Hi, Anon," she says, tracing the curve of her lower lip with a slender finger. "It's your lucky day!"

What do you do now?
* [[Waifu Quest/sex|Flying-tackle her, dick first]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage|Tie her up]]
* [[Waifu Quest/movies|Invite her in to watch some Netflix]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizzawhere|Ask her where the pizza guy is]]
* [[Waifu Quest/beer|Criticize her taste in beer]]
* [[Waifu Quest/nope|Close the door]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/waifu

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:34:29 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Oh my goodness, it's your waifu--wearing a side-tie bikini and holding a six-pack of Miller Genuine Draft! "Hi, Anon," she says, tracing the curve of her lower lip with a slender…'

Oh my goodness, it's your waifu--wearing a side-tie bikini and holding a six-pack of Miller Genuine Draft!
"Hi, Anon," she says, tracing the curve of her lower lip with a slender finger. "It's your lucky day!"

What do you do now?
* [[Waifu Quest/sex|Flying-tackle her, dick first]]
* [[Waifu Quest/bondage|Tie her up]]
* [[Waifu Quest/movies|Invite her in to watch some Netflix]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizzawhere|Ask her where the pizza guy is]]
* [[Waifu Quest/beer|Criticize her taste in beer]]
* [[Waifu Quest/nope|Close the door]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/figure2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:28:14 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You decide the defect isn't ''that'' bad. You can still fap to the figure. You wouldn't want to rock the boat or anything. Why, if you complained to the company, you would probab…'

You decide the defect isn't ''that'' bad. You can still fap to the figure. You wouldn't want to rock the boat or anything. Why, if you complained to the company, you would probably just get embroiled in life-destroying litigation!

Anyway, the more you admire your new figure, the more you become sexually attracted to Kyubey's face. By the time you realize it, it's already too late! You are unable to have an orgasm unless you're looking at Kyubey's face!

／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼

GAME OVER-- You scored -181 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/figure1

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:25:07 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You call the company's support hotline. After 2 hours on hold, you get connected to a guy in India. He says it's user error and refuses to send you a replacement. You're left wit…'

You call the company's support hotline. After 2 hours on hold, you get connected to a guy in India. He says it's user error and refuses to send you a replacement. You're left with no choice but to sue them! The resulting litigation consumes the next 20 years of your life, all of your assets, as well as your dignity as the company obtains all your forum login information in discovery. At the hearing on your third amended cross-motion for summary judgment, the company's lawyer shows the judge printouts of your posts on a My Little Pony erotic roleplaying forum. Everyone in the courtroom laughs at you.

Eventually, the legal battle bankrupts you and you commit suicide by jumping in front of a train. Angry commuters shit-talk you on Twitter for the next couple of days. Then, there is nothing.

GAME OVER-- You scored 38 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/package

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:17:34 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Is that a Hobby Search logo on the side of the box? Yes, it is! This must be your brand new figurine! Excited, you rip open the packaging, tossing the plastic air baggies aside..…'

Is that a Hobby Search logo on the side of the box? Yes, it is! This must be your brand new figurine! Excited, you rip open the packaging, tossing the plastic air baggies aside... Soon, you see the bright pink of the box. It's the newest, special edition, 1/8 scale figure of your waifu! With the new face sculpt based on her original character designer's sketches! Her accessories attach with little rare earth magnets, no pegs required! Plus her clothes can be removed!

But wait... Oh no, there's been a mistake at the factory! Instead of her face, she has Kyubey's face! ◕ ‿‿ ◕

What now? WHAT NOW?!
* [[Waifu Quest/figure1|Call the company and complain]]
* [[Waifu Quest/figure2|Live with it]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza4

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:14:02 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Ha ha, motherfucker. Okay, what is it really? * Pepperoni * Hawaiian * Chicago style [[Category:Waifu Quest…'

Ha ha, motherfucker. Okay, what is it really?

* [[Waifu Quest/pizza1|Pepperoni]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza2|Hawaiian]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza3|Chicago style]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza3

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:11:57 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Mm, Chicago style! You love those big hunks of meat and vegetables wreathed in that thick sauce, just bursting with tomato flavor. You love that oven-fired pastry crust, so thick…'

Mm, Chicago style! You love those big hunks of meat and vegetables wreathed in that thick sauce, just bursting with tomato flavor. You love that oven-fired pastry crust, so thick yet so flaky. You love to crack the crust with your fork and stir the buttery crumbles into the sauce. What a treat!

Unfortunately, your friends are all New Yorkers. When you take a picture of your pizza and post it to Facebook, they make fun of you for eating something that's not real pizza. You decide to kill yourself in shame--by sticking your face in the pizza and drowning yourself in the sauce. It is the most delicious death you could ever ask for.

GAME OVER-- You scored 103 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza2a

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:07:52 GMT

Zunface:

"BITCHES DON'T KNOW ABOUT MY HECKA-SUBTLE FLAVORS, BRO!" Guy Fieri flexes, squeezing out droplets of orange oil not unlike the stuff that sloughs off the surface of microwave pizzas. One of the oil droplets lands in your mouth. Gross. "IT'S TIME TO GET EIGHT KINDS OF SICK-NASTY ON YOUR TASTING-HOLE! OOOOH YEAH!"

You open your mouth to scream, but it's already too late. The police find your body with three cloves of garlic and a stick of butter lodged in your mouth. Your liver has been surgically cut out and replaced with a whole cheesecake. Sprinkled on and around your corpse are bits of flavorless dried-up McCormick brand basil bought from a Safeway in San Bernadino. They never find your genitals.

In place of your obituary, the newspaper runs a bad review by Anthony Bourdain.

GAME OVER-- You scored 2 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza2a

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 20:03:08 GMT

Zunface: Created page with '"BITCHES DON'T KNOW ABOUT MY HECKA-SUBTLE FLAVORS, BRO!" Guy Fieri flexes, squeezing out droplets of orange oil not unlike the stuff that sloughs off the surface of microwave piz…'

"BITCHES DON'T KNOW ABOUT MY HECKA-SUBTLE FLAVORS, BRO!" Guy Fieri flexes, squeezing out droplets of orange oil not unlike the stuff that sloughs off the surface of microwave pizzas. One of the oil droplets lands in your mouth. Gross. "IT'S TIME TO GET EIGHT KINDS OF SICK-NASTY ON YOUR TASTING-HOLE! OOOOH YEAH!"

You open your mouth to scream, but it's already too late. The police find your body with three cloves of garlic and a stick of butter lodged in your mouth. Your liver has been surgically cut out and replaced with a whole cheesecake. Sprinkled on and around your corpse are bits of flavorless dried-up McCormick brand basil bought from a Safeway in San Bernadino.

In place of your obituary, the newspaper runs a bad review by Anthony Bourdain.

GAME OVER-- You scored 2 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:57:02 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Yes, it's a Hawaiian pizza! The pineapple is so sweet and the Canadian bacon so salty. But wait! Suddenly, Guy Fieri bursts through your wall like the Kool-Aid Man! "AYYYYYY, YOU…'

Yes, it's a Hawaiian pizza! The pineapple is so sweet and the Canadian bacon so salty. But wait! Suddenly, Guy Fieri bursts through your wall like the Kool-Aid Man!
"AYYYYYY, YOU CALL THAT FLAVOR?" he yells at you, picking your brand new Kantai Collection calendar off his head where it's impaled by his porcupine-like hair.

* [[Waifu Quest/pizza2a|"Er... yes?"]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza1

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:53:37 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Oh, of ''course'' it's pepperoni. How perfectly typical. You know, if you're just going to go with the ''safe'' choice every time, what's the point of even playing this CYOA? Man…'

Oh, of ''course'' it's pepperoni. How perfectly typical. You know, if you're just going to go with the ''safe'' choice every time, what's the point of even playing this CYOA? Man, I don't have time for you. I should be doing work right now.

GAME OVER-- You scored -1 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/pizza

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:51:34 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Hooray, man! Your pizza is here! Actually, what kind of pizza was it, again? * Pepperoni * Hawaiian * [[Waifu Quest/pizza3|Chicago …'

Hooray, man! Your pizza is here! Actually, what kind of pizza was it, again?

* [[Waifu Quest/pizza1|Pepperoni]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza2|Hawaiian]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza3|Chicago style]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza4|Actually, it's not delivery. It's DiGiorno.]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/jehovah2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:46:50 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'They're used to this--the Jehovah's Witnesses apologize and leave you alone. What do you want to do now? * Check your Facebook * [[Waifu Quest/program|Get som…'

They're used to this--the Jehovah's Witnesses apologize and leave you alone. What do you want to do now?

* [[Waifu Quest/fb|Check your Facebook]]
* [[Waifu Quest/program|Get some programming done]]
* [[Waifu Quest/lewd|Look at lewd pictures]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/jehovah1

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:45:17 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You invite the Jehovah's Witnesses inside to talk. Clearing the pizza boxes and D&D gameboard off your kitchen table, you offer them a seat and your momentary attention. Turns ou…'

You invite the Jehovah's Witnesses inside to talk. Clearing the pizza boxes and D&D gameboard off your kitchen table, you offer them a seat and your momentary attention. Turns out what they're saying makes a lot of sense! You join up with their church and before long, you're running a mission in Chile, building homes for kids who've had their puppies shot by guerrillas. By the time you retire 50 years later, you've personally helped build over 200 houses and your organization has paid for many more. Directly or indirectly, your actions have improved millions of lives. You die peacefully at the age of ninety-one, surrounded by friends, family, and people you've helped. The city names a street after you, and a couple years later an In-N-Out Burger opens there.

Great job!

GAME OVER-- You scored 999 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/jehovah

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:40:36 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You open the door to see two guys, just a little too clean-cut for this neighborhood, one of them holding a book, the other one looking judgmentally behind you at the enormous Ry…'

You open the door to see two guys, just a little too clean-cut for this neighborhood, one of them holding a book, the other one looking judgmentally behind you at the enormous Ryuuko wallscroll in your living room. What do you do now?

* [[Waifu Quest/jehovah1|Invite them in]]
* [[Waifu Quest/jehovah2|Yell at them for interrupting your dinner]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/terminator

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:37:50 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Before you can open your mouth and say, "This is so cool! Hold on, let me get my camera. It takes a minute to focus so just bear with me," you are dead. With you gone, the human …'

Before you can open your mouth and say, "This is so cool! Hold on, let me get my camera. It takes a minute to focus so just bear with me," you are dead. With you gone, the human resistance in the future is led by someone with actual leadership skills. Using surprise and tactical maneuverability to create local numerical superiority and exploit breakthroughs, the humans overrun the machines in a week. A new golden age of peace and progress follows.

I guess things worked out for the best after all!

GAME OVER-- You scored 541 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/Answer

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:33:28 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You decide you might as well. You get up and undo the deadbolt and pull the door wide open, and it's... * Your waifu! * [[Waifu Quest/package|A package for…'

You decide you might as well. You get up and undo the deadbolt and pull the door wide open, and it's...

* [[Waifu Quest/waifu|Your waifu!]]
* [[Waifu Quest/package|A package for you!]]
* [[Waifu Quest/pizza|A pizza!]]
* [[Waifu Quest/jehovah|A Jehovah's Witness!]]
* [[Waifu Quest/terminator|The Terminator!]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/lewd

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:31:00 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Sweet, you love lewd pictures! Doesn't everyone? You look at a picture of Haruhi licking the handrail on one of those moving walkways they have at the airport. Then you look at a…'

Sweet, you love lewd pictures! Doesn't everyone? You look at a picture of Haruhi licking the handrail on one of those moving walkways they have at the airport. Then you look at a picture of Madoka dressed up as a breadstick and sitting in a tub of ranch dressing.

It's so much fun, dude!

Now what?
* [[Waifu Quest/fb|Check your Facebook]]
* [[Waifu Quest/program|Do some programming]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/program2

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:22:49 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'You spend the next 10 hours fixing misplaced brackets. Then you do the same thing the next day. And the next. Eventually you die and nobody notices until your body starts to smel…'

You spend the next 10 hours fixing misplaced brackets. Then you do the same thing the next day. And the next. Eventually you die and nobody notices until your body starts to smell bad. When the county sends someone to break into your house and haul your hella gross carcass away, he looks at your dusted-over computer screen and says, "Wow, this is the worst Hello World I've ever seen."

GAME OVER-- You scored -52 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/program3

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:17:41 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'All right, so you did that. Coincidentally, this adventure is now set in the early '80s! Accordingly, you don't have a whole lot of choices for your waifu. It's pretty much just …'

All right, so you did that. Coincidentally, this adventure is now set in the early '80s! Accordingly, you don't have a whole lot of choices for your waifu. It's pretty much just Lum or Cutey Honey, bro! Also, there are no dakimakuras, and no Mountain Dew Code Red. The closest thing to an eroge is this one arcade game where you talk to a girl rendered entirely in wireframes and then she turns into Sinistar and yells "RUN COWARD!" in this staticky computerized voice because the guy who flashed the cabinet ROM did a shitty job!

* [[Waifu Quest|Jesus Christ, no! Take me back to the present!]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]

Waifu Quest/program4

Zunface — Sun, 01 Jun 2014 19:13:18 GMT

Zunface: Created page with 'Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of 1,000,000 Bitcoins. You promptly spend them all on an ICBM. Except it turns out it's an old North Korean Taepodong that's been pai…'

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of 1,000,000 Bitcoins. You promptly spend them all on an ICBM. Except it turns out it's an old North Korean Taepodong that's been painted to look like an American missile. Upon closer inspection, they didn't even get the markings right! The side of the missile reads "UNIFIED AMERICA STATE OF GOOD JOY."

Also, the warhead is leaking a lot of radioactivity and you get toe cancer and die.

GAME OVER-- You scored -32 out of 1000 points

* [[Waifu Quest|Retry?]]

[[Category:Waifu Quest]]