Create Your Own Story - User contributions [en]

Use your God powers on people

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 28 Mar 2017 16:53:02 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'Whomst will you use the powers on? *People majority consider evil, like Martin Shkreli or Hillary Clinton *[[People majority consider good, like Bernie Sanders or Filthy Fra…'

Whomst will you use the powers on?

*[[People majority consider evil, like Martin Shkreli or Hillary Clinton]]
*[[People majority consider good, like Bernie Sanders or Filthy Frank]]
*[[Random peeps who may or may not deserve it]]
*[[People whomst've hurt you in the past]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

I am everything and nothing...

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 14 Nov 2015 01:08:36 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"I am become death, the destroyer of worlds," you announce to no one in particular. "How can God exist, if God doesn't know if he exists? Existence is a machination of the natura…'

"I am become death, the destroyer of worlds," you announce to no one in particular. "How can God exist, if God doesn't know if he exists? Existence is a machination of the natural world; I being supernatural, cannot exist in space-time, therefore I do not exist." Space-time compresses on itself and nothing exists any more.

THE END.

[[Category: +Infinity|Endings]]

Ignore Jade. You're too busy sucking cock!

Impalalevi1 — Mon, 06 Jul 2015 03:32:47 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Nom, mm, mmm," as you taste his unbelievable cock. But suddenly, Jade rips you away from Beck. "ENOUGH, SLUT!" She hits you very hard in the face, and you see stars. *[[Hit her …'

"Nom, mm, mmm," as you taste his unbelievable cock. But suddenly, Jade rips you away from Beck.
"ENOUGH, SLUT!" She hits you very hard in the face, and you see stars.
*[[Hit her back]]
*[[Kiss Jade]]
[[Category: Victorious: Behind the Scenes]]

Magic keyboard/type a stupid story

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 12 Sep 2014 14:15:16 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You start typing with the keyboard. "''Once there was a big, fat clown who always punched giant earthworms in the face.''" POOF! To your surprise, that very image appears before …'

You start typing with the keyboard. "''Once there was a big, fat clown who always punched giant earthworms in the face.''" POOF! To your surprise, that very image appears before you! A big, fat clown stands a few feet away. Suddenly, a giant earthworm charges toward him. The clown rears back, and... THWACK! His fist smashes the poor annelid's countenance! "No way!" you cry, looking down at the keyboard. It gleams, as if to wink at you. "This must be a... ''magic keyboard''!" You chuckle. A brilliant idea has just wedged itself in your mind....
*[[Type "The big, fat clown gets hit by a purple Prius."]]
*[[Type "The big, fat clown turns into Emma Stone and kisses you."]]
*[[Type something else]]

[[Category: Magic Keyboard]]

Eat plums to survive

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 16 Jan 2014 21:33:39 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You eat the whole bag of plums. Lovely. Miss Snatch comes down the stairs and says, "Noooo EATING." You say, "Okay. Don't worry about it... nigga!" Miss Snatch was ''absolutely f…'

You eat the whole bag of plums. Lovely. Miss Snatch comes down the stairs and says, "Noooo EATING." You say, "Okay. Don't worry about it... nigga!" Miss Snatch was ''absolutely furious''. She called in Harrybo, who said, "Who wants to die?" What do you say back?

*[["Yeah. Me."]]
*[["I can kill people."]]
*[[Right you two. I want you to sit on the top of my googe, erect, meaty 65-year-old penis, until I cum in your hairy, unshaven little snatch, and you scream like a little girl."]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

Pay a "special visit" to your sexy, foreign friend, Tim

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 21 Nov 2013 22:31:12 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You knock on Tim's door. It opens, revealing a recently-showered-and-shaved Tim standing with only a towel on. Suddenly, the saxophone theme from "Careless Whisper" by George Mic…'

You knock on Tim's door. It opens, revealing a recently-showered-and-shaved Tim standing with only a towel on. Suddenly, the saxophone theme from "Careless Whisper" by George Micheals starts playing, as if backing music in a movie.

"Where is that coming from?" you ask, looking around, confused.

"Sorry; I left the stereo on," Tim replies, switching it off sexily. "So, what brings you to my dorm, bro?"

You pause, trying to figure out what to do next. Finally, you decide to:
*[[Tell him you came over to watch the new Evil Dead movie]]
*[[Tell him you came over to have a threesome with him and some hot bitch he will now invite over]]
*[[Tell him you want to marry him]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Ask Her What's Wrong

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 21 Nov 2013 22:24:21 GMT

Impalalevi1:

The peanut butter cup stops running and looks at you. "What?" she asks. "What did you say?"

"I said, 'What's wrong?'" you tell her.

"You will DIE!" she cries, and starts to run toward you.

You:
*[[Kill the peanut butter cup]]
*[[Kill yourself--why not?]]
*[[Kill someone else]]
*[[Don't kill anyone]]
[[Category:The Quest: A Story Starring YOU!]]

Ask Her What's Wrong

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 21 Nov 2013 22:23:35 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'The peanut butter cup stops running and looks at you. "What?" she asks. "What did you say?" "I said, 'What's wrong?'" you tell her. "You will DIE!" she cries, and starts to run…'

The peanut butter cup stops running and looks at you. "What?" she asks. "What did you say?"

"I said, 'What's wrong?'" you tell her.

"You will DIE!" she cries, and starts to run toward you.

You:
*[[Kill her]]
*[[Kill yourself]]
*[[Kill someone else]]
*[[Don't kill anyone]]
[[Category:The Quest: A Story Starring YOU!]]

Play with the dog

Impalalevi1 — Sun, 23 Dec 2012 17:17:25 GMT

Impalalevi1:

By "play", do you mean...
*[[Regular play, like throwing a stick for it to fetch, scrathing its ears, etc.?]]

Or...
*[[Sexual play, like sucking his doggie dick, putting peanut butter on your pussy and letting him lick it off, and even putting his erect dog-boner into your hairless, virgin snatch?]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

Play with the dog

Impalalevi1 — Sun, 23 Dec 2012 17:16:02 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'By "play", do you mean... *Regular play, like throwing a stick for it to fetch, scrathing its ears, etc.? Or... *[[Sexual play, like sucking his doggie dick, putting peanut …'

By "play", do you mean...
*[[Regular play, like throwing a stick for it to fetch, scrathing its ears, etc.?]]

Or...
*[[Sexual play, like sucking his doggie dick, putting peanut butter on your pussy and letting himm lick it if, and even putting his erect dog-boner into your hairless, virgin snatch?]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

You can't pass up a couple of plausible lesbians! Confront them!

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 22 Dec 2012 20:46:05 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"How long have you bitches known each other?" you inquire, while approaching their table. One gives you a shocked look, and the other raises her eyebrow in a preppy-chick kind o…'

"How long have you bitches known each other?" you inquire, while approaching their table.

One gives you a shocked look, and the other raises her eyebrow in a preppy-chick kind of way. "Excuse me?!" the eyebrow-lifting one says snottily.

"I'm sorry," you apologize. You unbutton the first three buttons of your shirt and expose your manly tuft of chest hair. "FOR how long have you bitches known each other?" No girl can resist a grammatically intelligent man.

To your surprise, the bitches just get up and walk away from you.
*[[Follow the bitches to wherever they're going and rape the ovaries out of them]]
*[[Shrug and continue your search]]
*[[Squeeze out a cleveland steamer on their chests]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Report that you will make him/her a sandwich

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 21 Dec 2012 22:20:25 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"What kind of sandwich?" the voice demands to know. "Uhh, what kind do you want?" you inquire in return. "Surprise me." You sigh. Which kind will you make for him/her? *[[Colb…'

"What kind of sandwich?" the voice demands to know.

"Uhh, what kind do you want?" you inquire in return.

"Surprise me."

You sigh. Which kind will you make for him/her?
*[[Colby and pastrami on rye]]
*[[Roast beef and melted swiss with dijon mustard]]
*[[The Broodwich]]
*[[Order a Cold Cut Combo from the underworld Subway]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

Hop to the center of the pond, where you'll be out of reach

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 21 Dec 2012 21:55:41 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You hop out to the middle of the pond. You sigh happily. You're safe. But then, you see the human pick up your best friend, Larry, and kiss him. You watch in horror as he turns …'

You hop out to the middle of the pond. You sigh happily. You're safe.

But then, you see the human pick up your best friend, Larry, and kiss him. You watch in horror as he turns into a human, too!

What do you do?
*[[Follow Larry and the human as they walk away]]
*[[Try to damage the human with your flickish tongue]]
*[[Try to get the human to kiss you too]]
*[[Drown yourself]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

Scope out some girls

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 07 Dec 2012 04:32:18 GMT

Impalalevi1:

You start walking down the hallway, but then you stop. Where are you going to go to, in order to find some hotties?
*[[I want some nerd ass! To the library!]]
*[[I want some athletic ass! To the gym!]]
*[[I want some mature ass! To the teacher's lounge!]]

*[[I want some Gothic ass! To the graveyard!]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Go get Shelby. Make her your sandwich bitch--or "sandbitch" (you snicker)

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 13 Nov 2012 21:48:17 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Why would I want to make you a sandwich?" Shelby whines, as you drag her back to your dorm. "Because... I... you're a woman, so..." "What's that supposed to mean? You're a sex…'

"Why would I want to make you a sandwich?" Shelby whines, as you drag her back to your dorm.

"Because... I... you're a woman, so..."

"What's that supposed to mean? You're a sexist! A dirty, dirty sexist!"

You sigh, and using your manly intellect, you deduce that she is not in the mood to make you a sandwich. You're going to have to offer her something in return. Ugh--relationships are hard-ass work, bro!

"Shelby, if you make me a penis-kicking sandwich, I will...
*[[...have sex with anyone you want me to--even a guy. Even a teacher. Even an old, smelly teacher guy!"]]
*[[...eat said sandwich, and then your succulent snatch!"]]
*[[...jack off in the university's library!"]]
*[[...squeeze out a cleveland steamer on Tim's chest!"]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Clean your television screen!

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 13 Nov 2012 21:37:03 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You grab some windex and a roll of paper towel, and wipe the screen clean. You step back, and see that Good Luck Charlie has begun to play! What do you do? *[[Masturbate to Good …'

You grab some windex and a roll of paper towel, and wipe the screen clean. You step back, and see that Good Luck Charlie has begun to play! What do you do?
*[[Masturbate to Good Luck Charlie]]
*[[Change it to Nickelodeon]]
*[[Switch off the T.V. and search for child porn on obscure, underground websites on your laptop]]
[[Category: Pedo romp]]

Wait and see how Ari responds to your compliment

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 08 Nov 2012 03:15:51 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Well, thanks," Ari says, blushing slightly, "but your hair is way better. It's so straight, and the jagged layers are just perfect! You're just so emo--it's unbelievable!" He lo…'

"Well, thanks," Ari says, blushing slightly, "but your hair is way better. It's so straight, and the jagged layers are just perfect! You're just so emo--it's unbelievable!" He looks down, embarassed.

"Ari..." you say gently, lifting his chin to look at you. "You are my best friend. You are extremely nice, and way cool, and...
*[[sexy."]]
*[[emo enough to start shaving your legs."]]
*[[non-conforming as can be!"]]
*[[you kind of look like Mordecai from Regular Show."]]
[[Category: Fuck Your Friend]]

Talk about the weather

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 03 Nov 2012 15:59:19 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"This weather is fantastic!" you exclaim and sip on your lemon iced tea. "Well, of course!" Jane replies happily. "It's always nice in Southern California! Why do you think so m…'

"This weather is fantastic!" you exclaim and sip on your lemon iced tea.

"Well, of course!" Jane replies happily. "It's always nice in Southern California! Why do you think so many people live here?"

"Oh, I know, girl," you tease. "I'm so glad I moved to L.A.! I wouldn't want to live anywhere else! So many things to do, so many fun restaurants and clubs... not to mention all of the hot, physically fit people! You being one of them!"

She blushes. "Really?"
*[["Totally, girl! You're sexy as hell!"]]
*[["Nah. I was just joking."]]
*[["Sure. Now suck my penis, please."]]
[[Category: Fuck Your Friend]]

Compliment sexy emo Ari

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 03 Nov 2012 01:34:22 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"You're looking particularly emo today," you observe. "Thanks!" Ari beams. "You're pretty emo yourself!" You look down over your tight-fitting red and black satin shirt, your s…'

"You're looking particularly emo today," you observe.

"Thanks!" Ari beams. "You're pretty emo yourself!"

You look down over your tight-fitting red and black satin shirt, your skin-tight black skinny jeans, and your black and red sneakers with pride. You flip your long, pin-straight hair, which is black with a streak of emerald green, and say, "Thanks, Ari! I love your hair!"

He smiles, and you:
*[[Ask Ari if you can touch his hair]]
*[[Wait and see how Ari responds to your compliment]]
*[[Ask Ari to walk you home]]
[[Category: Fuck Your Friend]]

Lydia

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 02 Nov 2012 17:42:40 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You've had a crush on your Goth friend, Lydia, for a long time--since the day you met her, in 6th grade, actually. Ever since then, you've been staring at her during classes, sle…'

You've had a crush on your Goth friend, Lydia, for a long time--since the day you met her, in 6th grade, actually. Ever since then, you've been staring at her during classes, sleeping over at her house (and you even recently started sleeping in her bed with her!), and even kissed her while she was sleeping, the last time you slept over!

You just wish you could be her lover, but you're scared that if you admit how you feel about her, she might not feel the same way and reject you.

Currently, you are in Women's Studies class, and Lydia is seated next to you, taking notes as Ms. Sanchez drones on about the Seneca Falls convention. Do you:
*[[Tell Lydia she looks pretty today]]
*[[Ask Ms. Sanchez about lesbianism--this is Women's Studies, after all]]
*[[Kiss Lydia on the lips]]
*[[Inquire of Lydia if she wants to come to your house after school]]
[[Category: Fuck Your Friend]]

Waving toward you

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 02 Nov 2012 17:33:05 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Hey, buddy," you say, approaching him. Your eyes scan his toned, muscular physique, which is covered by black, skin-tight jeans, a tight black THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER t-shirt, a…'

"Hey, buddy," you say, approaching him. Your eyes scan his toned, muscular physique, which is covered by black, skin-tight jeans, a tight black THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER t-shirt, and black and white chucks. You ogle at his medium-length, black hair which is swept to the side over his right eye and layered and straightened meticulously. You want him. He is your perfect man. You need him.

"Hey, ___!" he greets you enthusiastically. Hearing him say your name with his voluptuous voice causes your already half-hard penis to become a fully bonafide--or BONEified--well, boner. Do you:
*[[Compliment sexy emo Ari]]
*[[Ask sexy emo Ari to come to your apartment]]
*[[Whip out your boner and ask Ari to jack you off]]
[[Category: Fuck Your Friend]]

Run along--don't want to be late for class

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 02 Nov 2012 12:11:53 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You say, "Goodbye" to Kat and run along to your costume design class. But even as you sit, twenty minutes later, deciding how to dress the extras for your class movie, you just c…'

You say, "Goodbye" to Kat and run along to your costume design class. But even as you sit, twenty minutes later, deciding how to dress the extras for your class movie, you just can't shake the idea of Kat being in a porno. On the surface, it bothers you, but deep inside--though you won't admit it--it turns you on. Immensely.

You'll just have to shrug and...
*[[Talk to Kat about it before your next class]]
*[[Outfit the extras in sexy lingerie--even the guys!]]
*[[Decide to make your own class movie for Costume Design 101 a porno]]
[[Category: Victorious: Behind the Scenes]]

Category:Sister Complex

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 19 Oct 2012 01:34:50 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'An incest--I mean index!--of the pages within the category "Sister Complex".'

An incest--I mean index!--of the pages within the category "Sister Complex".

Category:Anal Fun

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 18 Oct 2012 02:31:14 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'A rectally stimulating index of pages in the story "Anal Fun".'

A rectally stimulating index of pages in the story "Anal Fun".

You're a girl. You can ignore it. Duh.

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 16 Oct 2012 20:38:29 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'Girls don't get horny. Everyone knows that. That previous writer must have been a guy, because only guys get horny and want to masturbate. Guys are dumbasses. Wait. I am a guy. …'

Girls don't get horny. Everyone knows that. That previous writer must have been a guy, because only guys get horny and want to masturbate. Guys are dumbasses.

Wait. I am a guy. The previous writer is me, Levi. Weird.

Anyway, you just wait, and then the doorbell rings. Dost thou...
*[[Open the door... duh!]]
*[[Open the door, and then slam it in Erin's face]]
*[[Take all of your clothes off before opening the door]]
*[[Ask, "Who is it?", before opening the door, like a NORMAL PERSON]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

I want some mature ass! To the teacher's lounge!

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 11 Oct 2012 00:40:15 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'Strutting into the teacher's lounge, you spot a plethora of boner-inducing teachers. Which do you choose to pursue? *[[Professor Swenson, the hot and oh-so-flexible cheerleading …'

Strutting into the teacher's lounge, you spot a plethora of boner-inducing teachers. Which do you choose to pursue?
*[[Professor Swenson, the hot and oh-so-flexible cheerleading squad leader and English professor]]
*[[Professor Goswitz, the sensual art professor whose gazings give you a creeping sensation that she wants the d!]]
*[[Professor Linde, the Drama teacher who talks about lascivious topics a little more than her job requires]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Draw your lightsaber and duel with Levi

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 25 Sep 2012 00:43:27 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'Beezzeooom! (The sound a lightsaber makes when it is ignited. If you watch Star Wars, you should know what this sounds like.). The red beam of energy rises from your sword. Red b…'

Beezzeooom! (The sound a lightsaber makes when it is ignited. If you watch Star Wars, you should know what this sounds like.). The red beam of energy rises from your sword. Red being the color of the Sith.

Bezzeeooom! Levi's blue lightsaber is ignited.

"So, this is what it comes down to, huh, Sarah?" Levi observes, moving closer to you.

"I'll crush you, you Liberal scum," you retort, "and the Republican Empire will rule the galaxy--I mean country!"

"Have at thee, tyrant!" Levi bellows as he lunges at you. Your swords collide and bounce off of each other. He swings at you again, and you...
*[[Block the strike with your lightsaber]]
*[[Force push him off the stage]]
*[[Jump and do a backflip to dodge the strike]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Sarah: An agressive conservative that lives in a dorm a few doors down the hall from Eddie and secretly loves Levi, her worst enemy

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 25 Sep 2012 00:34:23 GMT

Impalalevi1:

Somewhat attractive, your silky dark brown hair causes many-a passerby to turn and stare. You pride yourself on your curvy figure, but you adhere to the rigid ideals of Conservativism. Therefore, you never wear attire that shows any skin above the knee.

----

You're just minding your business, preaching to thousands of people about how we need to destroy all of the liberals and all of the gay people, when all of a sudden, Levi, the most avid liberal you know, comes onto the stage. How do you handle it?

*[[Ignore him and continue your tirade]]

*[[Yell at Levi]]

*[[Draw your lightsaber and duel with Levi]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Eddie: A ruggedly strong teen with a soft spot for the ladies

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 23:19:01 GMT

Impalalevi1:

We'll call you Eddie. You are remarkably unremarkable with your boy next door looks and brown hair that slicks back without product like a character from an anime. A lover of the Metal, you proudly wear an Iron Maiden tee under an unzipped Grateful Dead sweatshirt. Life is never too boring since you share the dorm with your friends Levi and Tim.

Shelby, Nicole and Desiree live at the dorm across from yours, and are throwing a party in around a half-hour. As fun as that might be you also just got a new game for your console that is holding the attention of everyone in the dorm, and you're not sure if you want to stop playing. Also, since it's Sunday the game is on...

Right now your life is just one big first-world problem. It's not like you have tests to study for or projects to finish after all.

Do you...

[[Attend the girl's party]]

[[Play video games til your mind rots]]

Or...

[[Watch the game]]
Or...
*[[Try to seduce Tim]]

Or...

*[[Try to seduce Levi]]

[[Category:Obscura]]

Cum in her

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 01 Sep 2012 19:01:25 GMT

Impalalevi1:

You have another baby in 9 months making it two boys a 5 year old and a new born

The end
[[Category:Icarly: Iwant sex]]
[[Category: Endings]]

-go to school the next day

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 01 Sep 2012 18:52:42 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You walk into the high school. In the main hallway, Miss Briggs is shouting at students through her trademark megaphone, Sam is trying to give Gibby a wedgie, Carly is nervously …'

You walk into the high school. In the main hallway, Miss Briggs is shouting at students through her trademark megaphone, Sam is trying to give Gibby a wedgie, Carly is nervously talking to Shane, your hot A/V buddy, who just got out of the hospital, Miss Ackerman is walking toward the office, Principal Franklin is just walking out of the office and gives Miss Ackerman a lusty stare as he passes, and finally Mr. Howard is scoping out the room, likely trying to find someoneto reprimand.
*[[Try to "calm down" Miss Briggs]]
*[[Approach Sam and the Gibster]]
*[[Approach the voluptuously hot Shane and Carly]]
*[[Hit on Miss Ackerman]]
*[[Try to hook up Miss Ackerman and Principal Franklin]]

*[[Hide in the locker room and masturbate to porn on your laptop]]
[[Category: Icarly: Iwant sex]]

Cry, because the magical black man has touched your soul

Impalalevi1 — Fri, 31 Aug 2012 03:07:20 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"That's right, son," the voice coos. "Let it all out. Let all that shit out." "I... I can't... she was supposed to... byaaaahaaaahaaa!" you stammer, and then finally explode wit…'

"That's right, son," the voice coos. "Let it all out. Let all that shit out."

"I... I can't... she was supposed to... byaaaahaaaahaaa!" you stammer, and then finally explode with tears streaming down your face.

"That's right, son. Now, I'mma materialize into a form that yo human mind can comprehend."

"Is that why you're talking like a black man?" you ask, still sobbing.

"Black--? Man, what da fuck?! You goddamn racist mothafuckin' cracka-ass piece of... fuck you, nigga!"

"I'm sorry. I just..."

"You just what?! Just because my accent might sound kinna simila to a black-ass nigga's, you assume I black?! Go to hell, nigga! Now I ain't gonna materialize fo yo ass!"

*[[Apologize and try to convince him to materialize]]
*[[Call him some derogatory names]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Tell the voice you don't think you're capable of going to such a glorious place

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 30 Aug 2012 17:48:15 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Not capable--?!" the voice bellows in irate response. "Man, fuck yo god damn... shit, nigga... fuckin'--you don't think you're capable of going to California?" "No," you reply …'

"Not capable--?!" the voice bellows in irate response. "Man, fuck yo god damn... shit, nigga... fuckin'--you don't think you're capable of going to California?"

"No," you reply sadly. "I don't think I'm capable of much of anything."

"Man, shut yo god damn, motherfuckin', playa-hatin' mouth!" the voice screams. It takes a deep breath to calm itself. "Listen, son. I know why you don't feel capable of anything. I know why you seek others' approval on everything you do. I know why you stalk people, and then run like hell, if they ever start to accept you. It's because yo momma never gave you da suga she was supposed to, when you was a kid."

"I read about that! Unmet childhood emotional needs!"

"Damn straight, son. She fucked you up pretty bad, but guess what? She didn't mean to. It was just because her momma never gave her no suga neither!"
*[[What the hell is this magical black man in the sky talking about?]]
*[[Cry, because the magical black man has touched your soul]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Answer the voice's goddamn question

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 30 Aug 2012 17:35:16 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"What am I doing?" you repeat, scared, looking to the skies. "I'm about to eat a Hot Pocket." "Fuck you!" the voice cries. You let out a frightened whimper. "I... I'm sorry....…'

"What am I doing?" you repeat, scared, looking to the skies. "I'm about to eat a Hot Pocket."

"Fuck you!" the voice cries.

You let out a frightened whimper. "I... I'm sorry...."

"Fuck you, man," the voice repeats. "I don't mean what are you doing right this second; I mean what the hell the hell are you doing with your LIFE, son?"

"M-My life?" you echo, thoroughly demeaned.

"Yeah, motherfucker! You're wasting it! It's passing you by, you dumbass! You want to go to California, right?"

"Yes."

"Then what the hell are you still doing in this shit-hole farmer hick motherfuckin' place?! Why the FUCK are you still in Wisconsin, nigga?!"
*[[Tell the voice you're not sure]]
*[[Tell the voice you don't think you're capable of going to such a glorious place]]
*[[Get yourself screened for a schizophreniform disorder]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Convect the most advanced food you are able to: a Hot Pocket

Impalalevi1 — Wed, 29 Aug 2012 23:37:42 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You throw a ham and cheese flavored Hot Pocket into the microwave and set it for 1:00. You press start. One minute later, you take it out and set it on the counter to cool. "Jus…'

You throw a ham and cheese flavored Hot Pocket into the microwave and set it for 1:00. You press start. One minute later, you take it out and set it on the counter to cool.

"Just what the hell are you doing?!" a angry voice, which you cannot pinpoint the source of, demands.

"Umm, who said that?" you wonder, frightened.

"Man, shut the fuck up!" the voice orders in response.

"Who are you?" you ask, growing hysterical. "What do you want?"

"I'm inside your mind, fool," the voice growls. "Now, answer my goddamn question!"
*[[Answer the voice's goddamn question]]
*[[Search for the source of the voice--this has got to be a prank]]
*[[Ignore the voice and try to enjoy your hot pocket]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

You turn on your computer

Impalalevi1 — Thu, 23 Aug 2012 04:57:02 GMT

Impalalevi1:

You turn on the silver Dell laptop and connect to the wifi. You bring up Google Chrome. It brings you straight to Google.com, of course. You click on Videos. You click on the search bar and type:
*[['Hot girl giving blowjob'--simple enough]]
*[['Redhead gets fucked missionary'--you're pretty damn specific]]
*[['Twink gets plowed by bear'--Hey. Everybody likes a good guy-on-guy every once in a while, right?]]

Or...

*[[Log in to your Facebook]]

[[Category: Obscura]]

Trina takes a bite as you watch to see her expression.

Impalalevi1 — Mon, 20 Aug 2012 02:38:52 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'Trina raises the sandwich to her mouth and sinks her teeth into it. She immediately spits out what she bit off. "Eww!" Trina screams. "Tori! What the hell did you put on this san…'

Trina raises the sandwich to her mouth and sinks her teeth into it. She immediately spits out what she bit off. "Eww!" Trina screams. "Tori! What the hell did you put on this sandwich?"
*[[Tell Trina what you put on the sandwich]]
*[[Show Trina what you put on the sandwich]]
*[[Take the sandwich and eat it yourself]]
[[Category: Victorious: Behind the Scenes]]

Icarly: Iwant sex

Impalalevi1 — Sun, 19 Aug 2012 04:46:58 GMT

Impalalevi1:

Your name is Freddie Benson, you and your best friends; Carly and Sam have been nothing but friends for a long time. Recently you had kissed Sam in the heat of the moment yet nothing had ever changed after that. You want it to though, you want Sam and Carly, or even better; a threesome. Can you make your dreams reality?

----
It's 5:00 on Friday. Icarly will be in an hour. What do you want to do?

[[-Visit Carly]]

[[-Visit Sam]]

[[-Masturbate]]

[[-Call Carly]]

[[-Call Sam]]

[[-Call them both at the same time]]

[[-Rape your mother]]

[[-Get ready for Icarly]]

[[-Watch some cartoons]]

[[-Sam calls you]]

[[-Sneak in Carly's house]]

[[-Go to the groovy smoothie]]

[[-Go to the Cheesecake Warehouse]]

[[-Go over to the Shays' and try to have a threesome with Carly and Spencer]]

[[-sleep with your mother]]

[[Category:Icarly: Iwant sex]]

See who's at the door

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 07 Aug 2012 19:16:13 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Have you heard the news?" asks the visitor, as you swing the door open. It's Sarah. No--not Conservative Extremist, Levi's enemy Sarah. The other Sarah. She is marked by a boner…'

"Have you heard the news?" asks the visitor, as you swing the door open. It's Sarah. No--not Conservative Extremist, Levi's enemy Sarah. The other Sarah. She is marked by a boner-shriveling devotion to the Christian cult--er, uh, religion.

"What news?" you retort, scowling indignantly.

She hands you a book. "Here. Enlighten yourself, friend."

You gaze down at it. On the cover, the letters B, I, B, L, and E have been written. You're wonder what this enigmatic volume is, what author would make up strange words, like "bible"....
*[[Ask Sarah what this mysterious text is]]
*[[Realize that it's a bible, the book of pure evil, and throw it at Sarah's face]]
*[[Whip out your cock and piss on the bible]]
[[Category: Obscura]]

Category:Designing life

Impalalevi1 — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 02:11:46 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'An index of the pages in the story "Designing life".'

An index of the pages in the story "Designing life".

Tell Kat how dangerous porns can be

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 28 Jul 2012 04:01:52 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Kat, don't you know how dangerous pornos are?" you ask. "Dangerous?" Kat repeats innocently. "Yeah," you reply. "We're talking about having sex with strangers who have had sex…'

"Kat, don't you know how dangerous pornos are?" you ask.

"Dangerous?" Kat repeats innocently.

"Yeah," you reply. "We're talking about having sex with strangers who have had sex with countless other strangers who have had sex with countless other strangers, and, well, you get my point. You could get an STD, like HIV, or Crabs... or worse: you could get pregnant!"

Kat gasps in horror. "Oh, Tori! I'm too young to have a baby!"

"So you won't do the porn?"

"I'll just use birth control."

With that, Kat struts away. Do you:
*[[Go after Kat, and try to convince her not to do the porn]]
*[[Let Kat make her own decisions]]
*[[Ask Sikowitz to help you help Kat]]
[[Category: Victorious: Behind the Scenes]]

Is that a supercomputer?

Impalalevi1 — Wed, 25 Jul 2012 12:42:18 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You meander over to a huge supercomputer. There are lights and sounds of all sorts emitted from it. Your eyes sca, awed, over it's complex exterior. "Human," says a voice. The c…'

You meander over to a huge supercomputer. There are lights and sounds of all sorts emitted from it. Your eyes sca, awed, over it's complex exterior.

"Human," says a voice. The computer?

"Did--did you just speak?" you stammer at it.

"Indeed," the computer replies. "I am Skynet, the most intelligent supercomputer ever assembled. The occupants of Silicon Valley really knew their stuff."

"Skynet?" you repeat. "Wait. You said 'knew', not 'know'--"

"The occupants of Silicon Valley, California have been terminated."

Then it hits you. Cyberdyne, Skynet, terminated! It all makes sense now. This is Skynet, the supercomputer in control of the destruction of humankind, from the Terminator movies! Which means...
*[[Ask Skynet about Judgment Day]]
*[[I'm in Los Angeles, California! Or at least its greater metropolitan area]]
*[[I travelled to this future on August 28, 1997!]]

[[Category: +Infinity]]

Robotics

Impalalevi1 — Wed, 25 Jul 2012 12:30:16 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You sneak into a robot factory, and gasp when you lay eyes on... a human?! Standing in front of you is what looks exactly like a muscular male human, but is completely stationary…'

You sneak into a robot factory, and gasp when you lay eyes on... a human?! Standing in front of you is what looks exactly like a muscular male human, but is completely stationary, like a statue. You look by its feet. There's a sign that reads: "Cyberdyne Systems, Model 101". Cyberdyne? Where have you heard that before? It sounds so familiar....
*[[Try to remember where you heard "Cyberdyne"]]
*[[Go check out the "Model 1000" that just seems to stare right through you]]
*[[Is that a supercomputer?]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

+Infinity/God

Impalalevi1 — Wed, 25 Jul 2012 12:20:00 GMT

Impalalevi1:

You are God! That's exciting. You generated the universe! Quite an accomplishment (great job, by the way)! Now, what are you going to do with your unlimited power, first?
*[[Create another Earth]]

*[[Smite some of the bad people who currently walk the Earth]]

*[[Throw another one of your infamous God Parties at your mansion in Heaven]]
*[[Make it rain fire on dem damned Sodomites]]
*[[Make it rain, incessantly, for 40 days and 40 nights, just to be a dick, I guess]]
*[[Impregnate some chick named Mary. You need your son, Jesus Christ, to walk the Earth for a while]]
*[[Being the perfect being is boring. Try to kill yourself? O.o]]
*[[Adopt agnosticism (wtf?)? O.o]]

*[[Stick your God-penis into the time-space continuum]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]
{{+Status|ID=God}}

Are nervous. What if you're not hot enough to be in a porno?

Impalalevi1 — Mon, 09 Jul 2012 03:14:10 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with '"Are you kidding me?" Kat snaps, looking astonished. "Tori, you're like the hottest girl at Hollywood Arts!" "Really?" you wonder. "Of course!" Kat replies. "Now, meet me at my…'

"Are you kidding me?" Kat snaps, looking astonished. "Tori, you're like the hottest girl at Hollywood Arts!"

"Really?" you wonder.

"Of course!" Kat replies. "Now, meet me at my locker after school, and we'll go to the movie studio together, okay?"

"Okay," you agree, feeling really good about yourself.

'''AFTER SCHOOL'''

Do you:
*[[Meet Kat at her locker]]
*[[Change your mind and go home]]
[[Category: Victorious: Behind the Scenes]]

Suck Spencer's long cock

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 05:10:05 GMT

Impalalevi1: changed "cntinue" error to "continue"

You crawl past the kissing Carly and Sam to Spencer, whose dick is monstrously erect, as is yours. You take his into your hands and just ogle at his beauty.

"Oh," Spencer moans breathlessly. "Touch me, Freddie."

You close your mouth around the head of his cock. Euhoria shoots through you. It feels good to realize how gay you really are. Freeing.

You move your mouth downward, until his dick is halfway into your mouth, and then back upward again. You continue to do this, bobbing up and down, Spencer vocalize his pleasure loudly.

Do you:
*[[Let Spencer cum in your mouth]]
*[[Let Spencer cum on your face]]
*[[Don't let Spencer cum yet--put his dick up your ass]]
[[Category: Icarly: Iwant sex]]

Suck Spencer's long cock

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 05:08:17 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You crawl past the kissing Carly and Sam to Spencer, whose dick is monstrously erect, as is yours. You take his into your hands and just ogle at his beauty. "Oh," Spencer moans …'

You crawl past the kissing Carly and Sam to Spencer, whose dick is monstrously erect, as is yours. You take his into your hands and just ogle at his beauty.

"Oh," Spencer moans breathlessly. "Touch me, Freddie."

You close your mouth around the head of his cock. Euhoria shoots through you. It feels good to realize how gay you really are. Freeing.

You move your mouth downward, until his dick is halfway into your mouth, and then back upward again. You cntinue to do this, bobbing up and down, Spencer vocalize his pleasure loudly.

Do you:
*[[Let Spencer cum in your mouth]]
*[[Let Spencer cum on your face]]
*[[Don't let Spencer cum yet--put his dick up your ass]]
[[Category: Icarly: Iwant sex]]

Have everyone take their clothes off

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 05:01:42 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You, Carly, Sam, and Spencer begin removing each other's clothes. Once naked, you all feel each other up passionately. "Why don't we go into my bedroom, where we can be more com…'

You, Carly, Sam, and Spencer begin removing each other's clothes. Once naked, you all feel each other up passionately.

"Why don't we go into my bedroom, where we can be more comfortable?" suggests Spencer. The four of you pile onto his bed and make out some more.
*[[Suck Spencer's long cock]]
*[[Suck on Carly's tight pussy]]
*[[Suck on Sam's hairy vag]]
[[Category: Icarly: Iwant sex]]

Icarly: Iwant sex

Impalalevi1 — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 04:54:38 GMT

Impalalevi1:

Your name is Freddie Benson, you and your best friends; Carly and Sam have been nothing but friends for a long time. Recently you had kissed Sam in the heat of the moment yet nothing had ever changed after that. You want it to though, you want Sam and Carly, or even better; a threesome. Can you make your dreams reality?

----
It's 5:00 on Friday. Icarly will be in an hour. What do you want to do?

[[-Visit Carly]]

[[-Visit Sam]]

[[-Masturbate]]

[[-Call Carly]]

[[-Call Sam]]

[[-Call them both at the same time]]

[[-Rape your mother]]

[[-Get ready for Icarly]]

[[-Watch some cartoons]]

[[-Sam calls you]]

[[-Sneak in Carly's house]]

[[-Go to the groovy smoothie]]

[[-Go to the Cheesecake Warehouse]]

[[-Go over to the Shays' and try to have a threesome with Carly and Spencer]]

[[sleep with your mother]]

[[Category:Icarly: Iwant sex]]

Get a knife and kill yourself

Impalalevi1 — Mon, 02 Jul 2012 17:25:17 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You grab a Lego knife from your Lego kitchen. You thrust it into your Lego torso, but it simply glances off, since both are made of plastic. You try it again. Again. Nothing. Ma…'

You grab a Lego knife from your Lego kitchen. You thrust it into your Lego torso, but it simply glances off, since both are made of plastic. You try it again. Again. Nothing.

Maybe this is sign. They do say that people who want to commit suicide just feel stuck or are unhappy with their lives. Perhaps you should...
*[[Consult a Lego therapist]]
*[[Reevaluate your life's purpose]]
*[[Volunteer to help a charity or cause]]
*[[Search for a more effective way to end it all]]
[[Category: +Infinity]]

Church, smirch. You're right and you know it

Impalalevi1 — Sat, 30 Jun 2012 15:23:16 GMT

Impalalevi1: Created page with 'You can't just let the church feed people bullshit that isn't true. Bitches centuries from now would be learning that the Sun revolves around the Earth in school! You can't let t…'

You can't just let the church feed people bullshit that isn't true. Bitches centuries from now would be learning that the Sun revolves around the Earth in school! You can't let that happen!

So you'll burn.

The church hacks tie you to a stake and burn you alive... in the name of God, of course! Oh no--Christianity isn't hypocritical at all!

'''THE MARTYR'S END'''
[[Category: +Infinity]]
[[Category: Endings]]